Treading Water: My Journey to an ADHD Diagnosis

Hello 💜 I'm about 85% certain that I experience Undiagnosed ADHD and it is making me spiral a bit. I don't have it listed as a condition (yet) because I'm personally weary of self-diagnosing and leading myself in the wrong direction. However, this same occurrence happened with my OCD diagnosis. One day, I came across information that made my entire life from childhood to the present FINALLY make sense. I (obsessively) researched, asked questions, and really took all things into consideration before seeking a clinical diagnosis. I did nothing to mention my suspicions and answered honestly throughout because I had to prove to myself that this was real. The soon-retiring Psychiatrist without hesitation and full-confidence told me what I really knew to be true. "You have OCD." I f***ing knew it. Now I had a direction to go in. But I still have things going on that aren't effectively being addressed somehow. I recently discovered that ADHD often presents differently in women than in men. And I fit into those presentations like a glove since childhood. I'm going to be discussing it with my therapist soon. But I'm spiraling because I am so exhausted just trying to keep myself alive day-to-day with what I have and now I'm realizing there is probably another thing that's going to be difficult and exhausting to work through and it makes life sound like not a good time. I feel like I've been treading water since birth, all of the rafts I build keep disintegrating, and dry land is still hundreds of miles away. My soul is tired.