Hey I’m so sorry for what you’re going through. Unfortunately I can’t offer too much other than my endless support. Feel free to DM if you want. Please be strong

I have also gone to numerous m specialist with no results, and kind of gave up for a while. I have all your symptoms and more, and it's debilitating. I've been practicing being more mindful of my body, noting sensations and trying to isolate a muscle here and there. Through that I've discovered that yes, it is all about my muscles constantly contracting, holding so much tension. One time, after getting an intense Thai massage, I felt my shoulder, mouth and neck muscles relax, and holy crap my body has completely forgotten that sensation. It's hard to explain but my best hypothesis is that it has everything to do with muscle tension and the body forgetting how to relax. I'm still in so much pain but I feel more hopeful now. Physical therapy exercises like stretching and strengthening muscles truly do help. And as cliche as it sounds, body mindfulness is so important.

Cannabis aka weed has been the most effective treatment I ever used for my tmj. It relaxes me and my tension and if I feel it coming on use my firefly 2 vape it relaxes me and sometimes goes away within minutes, and sometimes goes away completely within 20-30

I was thrown between doctors and dentists for years and finally found a TMJ and sleep apnea doctor who made an appliance that is like a retainer but moves your jaw a little to realign it. Also some jaw strengthening exercises. Now I only wear it at night and it prevents grinding. The biggest thing for me was learning not to grind and notice when I do it.

I bought this book on Amazon to help me understand my TMJ and it is amazing: The TMJ Healing Plan: Ten Steps to Relieving Headaches, Neck Pain and Jaw Disorders (Positive Options for Health) https://www.amazon.com/dp/0897935241/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_PHACEF49XWDKPPAYQVHM

The first chapter is all about posture and how our posture affects our TMJ. That was so eye opening. I think it’s the idea that we have to get back to the basics, to retrain our bodies how to do things differently (like how to sit or stand or even what positions to sleep in) now that we have our TMJ diagnosis.

I have also learned that sleeping on our backs with head facing the ceiling is the best way to sleep bc it is the least amount of pressure/force on our jaws. Moist heat, physical therapy and myofacial massage, and yoga to help reduce tension as much as possible. We share the same symptoms, it’s debilitating, keep trying different things until you find something that works even if just a little 🙏🏼