Tips for Navigating Asperger's Syndrome as an Adult

Asperger's is an old name. They just call it autism spectrum disorder now. I was recently diagnosed (this year). I'm 47. I've had it all my life. Stress has always been difficult for me. It overwhelms all my sensory avenues and clogs my thoughts. If I'm feeling like I'm shutting down I'll go to the bathroom. I sit on the toilet and take a deep breath or two. Sometimes I just count while trying to regulate my breathing. If it smells in there I have to go outside so I excuse myself by saying that I left something in my car. It usually takes less than 5 minutes to bring myself back. I don't feel guilty because all those smokers get 15 minutes breaks to go do that. So it's ok for me to take a break sometimes too. If you have a coworker or manager who you feel ok to confide in safe words work too. So have a conversation with that person and explain that sometimes you get overwhelmed and need to escape for a few minutes to gather yourself. Tell them that it'll happen at the most inopportune time but if you don't get a chance to collect yourself then you'll lose control. Tell them that you're not violent or anything when you lose control but it's not suitable for that environment. Agree on the safe word then use it. Before you get overwhelmed say the same word to the person turn and walk away. When you come back just excuse yourself back into the situation, apologizing for needing to leave so abruptly. Don't explain anymore. Just leave it at that. Pick up where you can and move forward. Saying to much when you come back will cause the feelings to return so just ask for their understanding and move forward. One of my favorite things to say is "so, what's next" (after the apology) or "how do we move forward from here?" (Again, after the apology). That's how I handle stress in the workplace. As far as relationships. Oh my doors that get complicated. I truly do not have anything to help you in that area. It's taken all of 47 years to try to keep my mouth shut and let them say the words, and I STILL interrupt way too much!! One thing I can say for sure, people I love the most still have unpredictable things they want to say. If I just let them say it things go smoother externally. Internally sometimes though... OMG it's so hard