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sprite

2y ago

Tips for Making Friends with Severe Social Anxiety

does anyone have tips for making friends when you have severe social anxiety? my wife and i separated and now i have no one because i’m too anxious to talk to people. i’ve been so lonely but i feel like i lack social skills because it’s been years since i had any friends besides her. i don’t know how i can form relationships with people when i’m so scared of rejection/being disliked that i can barely speak. at this point i won’t even go to a store that doesn’t have self-checkouts because that simple interaction is too hard for me.

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Chrysanthemumbee

2y ago

Force yourself little by little. Maybe start by asking a grocery store employee where an item is. Then maybe giving someone near you, a compliment. Then the self checkout.
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sprite

2y ago

@JJ_123: that’s so reassuring, thank you! i definitely think i’ll check some out.
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JJ_123

2y ago

@sprite yes! So if there are more people going like say 15 or 20 or more usually there is no pressure to turn cameras on. If it's a smaller group sometimes the facilitator will ask but I would say like 90% of the time they acknowledge "if you're comfortable"... and worst case you can always just say "Sorry not able to" if you feel pressured
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sprite

2y ago

@TashaSkyUp : i have no choice but to start exposing myself to social situations, it just feels impossible. i’ve been trying to work on “making space” for my emotions instead of resisting them though, so i guess i’ve gotta make space for all of that anxiety and just deal with it!
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sprite

2y ago

@krosebee : ugh, covid certainly does not help with making friends! thank you :)
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sprite

2y ago

@JJ_123 : an online event is such a good idea, i’ve thought about it before but worried it would be weird of me to join with my camera off. but i don’t work and don’t talk to any of my old friends anymore so it seems my best bet! have you ever joined an online event with your camera off, or been to one where other people had their cameras off?
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TashaSkyUp

2y ago

I'm horrible at making friends lol. Though I manage to have several coworkers that I have wonderful working relationships with. It's still hard, painful even. Generally I just have become more okay with the idea that my heart is going to pound my head is going to race, I'm going to feel s strange and be embarrassed. But I'll survive and if I'm lucky I'll come out of the conversation having accomplished what I needed to and having a better relationship. It gets easier.
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krosebee

2y ago

It’s so hard to make new friends. I turned 20 right before Covid hit, but I never really have been good at it. Feel free to reach out to me. 😁
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JJ_123

2y ago

Hi Sprite! I live with social anxiety too and here are a few things that help me. I like to find online group activities with people I don't know as a practice. I usually look on EventBrite for something I'm interested in like a class. You can do video off or on if you're feeling brave. Something else I try is making plans out of the house with an old friend or coworker or family member. Choose someone you can be honest with to share your anxiety up front. Practice going out to a public space with people around you, who you don't necessarily have to speak to if you don't want to. I try to make plans with old friends so I if need to cancel last minute. I'm sorry you are having a hard time right now but know you're not alone! Try to see if there are small steps you can take to feel better long term and don't pressure yourself to do something big right away

The content in this post is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.

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