Struggling with Remembering Dates and Math

I can do really really complex math, I'm an engineer. I can do calculus as easily as algebra, and I can teach anyone the concepts, but look away from the page for a moment and that number is gone. Even if I stared at it for 5 minutes. My partner makes gentle fun of me for it and always double checks my numbers, which is completely fair. One time when I changed my tires for the season I thought I remembered the correct torque to tighten lugnuts to, and we ended up stopping on a road trip cause something seemed wrong with the tires, took us bringing it to a shop the next morning to learn that I didn't tighten them enough. We both laughed at the situation and he was astounded that for once he believed I had the correct number. We'll both be double checking the correct torque next time.

P.s. my ex used to be enraged I forgot our anniversary every year. He was like you're the wife, you're the one who's supposed to be getting mad at me for forgetting, not the other way around! My husband now is incredibly understanding and patient with the whole thing. We've been married five years and I still barely remember how birthday (it is 3 days after my kids birthday, or I would never have remembered it) I have 4 sisters, don't know any of their birthdays.. don't know my mom's, my dad's, my stepfather who raised me, none of it. Dates slide out my head liked their greased up with butter on a water slide haha... I just don't let it upset me anymore, and put everything in Google calenders, and my husband is a doll and shared my calendar so he can remind me of things. Don't let it get to you. Maybe rhythms can help you remember, short term, a string of numbers you MUST remember for a short time, like me, or perhaps you can assign 1-9 colors like a friend of mine does. She can remember color sequences but not number ones. She says it gets easier with time, but not for me. Keep trying til you find something that works for you!

I have Dyscalculia; I just learned this recently. I was complaining to my psychiatrist about how numbers just jumble around in my head when I try to remember them, and it's like trying to hold sand in my hands to remember dates. She was like honey... that's just dyslexia with numbers. I still don't know my times tables aside from the ones that feel like a rhythm to me (2s, 5s, 6s, 10s. It's like a song in my head and the rhythm is what I remember) I spent my whole life thinking I was just dumb; never knew you could have dyslexia with numbers. Mantra of the ADHD tribe, amirite? Well... I didn't get diagnosed with ADHD till I was 44 so at least for those of us who suffered most of our lives with adhd with no understanding of what was wrong, I hear that a lot (that we just assumed we were dumb, not about the numbers thing).