Struggling with Intimacy Due to Partner's Health Issues

i started depression around the same time i started puberty, so i was doomed from the beginning. depression and antidepressants ruined my sex life because i can't orgasm despite how annoyingly often i crave it

I have a hard time getting in the mood. My partner wants it every day. He knows it's hard for me and therefor doesn't ask. But I feel kinda shitty about going months without it.

You deserve to have your needs met in your relationship. I can relate to both sides of this story and it does hurt bad. Both partners in the relationship must be willing to improve and keep choosing eachother. If they refuse to try to do anything about it they are not willing to meet your needs ;( there has to be a middle ground

My guy has ED and his mental health isn't great so it makes it worse. And my trauma makes me either impossible to get turned on OR so sexually driven it could be considered an addiction. And it's hard for us to mentally understand each other even though we know these things

To be blunt...i'm 30 and am still a virgin due to all my health issues. I want more than anything to have a partner but serious health issues are a real turn off...so ya you could say it impacts not just your sex life but all parts of your life.

My husband is type 2 and his meds cause issues as well. Between his meds and my fibro we can go several months before intimacy occurs. We have found other ways to say what our bodies won't let us do

My fiance and I went a little over a year without because he has a back injury that makes things not work quite right and because I had a hysterectomy when I was 37 and was in desperate need of estrogen replacement therapy. Also, my mental health meds absolutely killed my desire to be intimate. I've since changed my mental health meds and got on estrogen but it's still a struggle. It helps a lot that he's my best friend and we truly enjoy each other's company so we're working through it. Good luck to you and yours!!

Yes I'm sorry. There are other forms of intimacy than sexual. I know this doesn't fix it. But cuddling and kissing and talking has helped me and my bf. He has an aversion to touch and I have trauma and vaginismus that make sex most times not enjoyable or on the table

Yes, mine has literally been 0 as of late, because I have been single for quite some time, mostly because I have avoided dating for over a decade because of severe depression, anxiety and PTSD. But to the OP, I am fairly certain that if your husband is indeed having valid migraines and not just using it as an excuse for something else (not saying he is, just being an advocate and making a point hopefully), that it could be a valid reason why he has been struggling with intimacy lately. I know a lot of times, men get a bum rap for being about nothing but 'physical attributes' when it comes to what attracts them, but something most men won't even admit themselves is that the emotional aspects of a relationship can be a lot more influential on a man than any sort of level of physical desire. If a man is simply not feeling good for something as silly as allergies, or in a bad mood/headspace because of depression, too much stress/ anxiety, or whatever he might be dealing with, he will more than likely feel "not in the mood". I recently watched a clip on YouTube where a guy was in the audience a talk show, and they were doing like random questions from the audience, and the guy asked about "things becoming cold in the bedroom", and the host answered "when was the last time you or your spouse tried preheating the oven before complaining about the lack of warmth? People are not microwaves that can just zap to full heat in seconds. More often we're like a gas stove that needs 'preheating' throughout the whole day, with things like compliments, appreciation without criticism, or other things to help him or her feel basic worth and value as a person/human being." and I was surprised how much I couldn't agree more, because even when I was lucky enough to have someone in my life who I was crazy in love with, I still hated myself when I couldn't feel romantic or intimate because of my own headspace, and not being in the right frame of mind to 'desire' them.

100% true Although if he really isn't in the mood from being backed up I feel that 100% because that's one of my major issues and why I'm not in the mood. I believe him and doesn't sound like he doesn't love you or doing anything else, unless that's your real thoughts. But with the very limited information I feel like he does love you and do desire you he's just very down and not doing well with his health or mental probably too. But either way communication is key as we all know. He needs to be able to openly talk to you. We all should be fully open yo our significant others and our selves.

✋intercourse leaves me exhausted, achy, and shaking. I honestly can't stand it. It takes a lot for my husband to convince me to get in bed with him. It doesn't mean I dont love him though. I love him plenty, and there are a million and one other ways to tell someone you love them than just s*x. Perhaps there is other forms of physical contact that yall could do that doesn't hurt for him?

I have lost my sex drive for about 3 months before.

My situation is the opposite. I'm the one who has completely lost my sex drive. I suspect it's my medication. But my doctor just prescribed me Vyleesi, which is supposed to help low sex drive. I haven't had a chance to try it yet though.

I feel so sorry your going through this. I am on the other end of that, meaning I am the one plagued with many health issues. My husband freaks out on me because I push him away. It has never been more then a month without having sex but he is the kind that wants it everyday and he has no health problems so he couldn't possibly know how I feel every day just being present and taking care of our children. I made it a point to start logging everytime we do and not letting it pass a week, so I can help him to understand that it hasn't been as long as he thinks. Have you guys tried anything other then sex to help you feel more wanted by him?

Same type of situation here ✋

Ughh yes! Mine is bc I have endometriosis do it hurts to have sex and the few days out of the month that I'm ok, I'm not in the mood

✋

Yes!!!!! 😭