Struggling with the Reality of Not Being Able to Work Anymore

I stopped working in 2019. It’s really hard at first because I was independent and not needing help. It slowly gets better when you grieve that that part of your life is over. Take one day at a time 💕

I come from a cultural and family where high achievement is expected. Unless your foot is amputated , the message that was explicitly sent was that , “ Keep it movin.” I didn’t list this in my surgeries, but I have had 21 surgeries to date for reproductive issues from 18 -31. I was pushed by my parents to continue grad school and work simatanously . Often times my surgical recovery period would be cut short by my parents notion that I didn’t need the amt of rest that everyone else did . I ran myself into the ground . I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia in 2018 that only progressed. It’s not till a family member’s Parkinson’s Diagnosis that mine was taken seriously… go figure. I can’t work . Pushing myself was toxic . Being around people who were convinced that high degrees and fancy jobs were more important than taking care of your health created a host of new problems. Not everyone is going to understand your illnesses and health struggles, even family . No one chooses this . If your parents are choosing to help you, show them gratitude in little ways when you can 🙂 Small acts of kindness make more of an impact than people think. I hope this was helpful.

And about the family thing, I also completely understand that. My parents have spent sooooooooo much time and money trying to help me, and I feel so guilty sometimes. But I try to shift my perspective more into… they are CHOOSING to help me! And I am so blessed because of it! You know?

I am completely with you. I had to drop out of college, and I cannot commit to a full-time job because I’m too sick. I’m currently a nanny for 12 hours a week, which is hard enough! What I tell myself to help myself is just… it’s not my fault this happened to me. For some reason, this horrible thing is affecting my life, but I just have to take care of myself nonetheless and take it day by day. Believe me, I’ve spent so many days feeling like shit and wanting my life to be different. But I finally started embracing who I am right now… that’s really all you can do. Try to find activities that make you happy that you can find the strength for! I’ve gotten super into reading and doing yoga lately.