I feel guilty when I’m not painting. All the time. Because I’m so in love with what I do, I live to do it. So when I’m not doing it I feel like I’m missing out. People who love me have helped me to see that short breaks where I’m resting, like REALLY resting, improves the quality and focus of my practice. To reorient myself away from the practice I have to remember that time worrying does not let my brain truly rest. Things like working to empty my brain in a meditative way, funnel any drive into a different activity, socializing with really stimulating gentle restorative philosophical etc. conversation. even just taking a break from practice to reorient thoughts about the practice, like taking a break from painting to research painting. For me some helpful externals to really divide my practice as an appendage of me as a human are elaborate baking, compiling music beat samples (audacity is a free program!) digital collage for the paintings (a program called affinity photo was on sale for 20 dollars to keep forever, and it is a near perfect functional photoshop duplicate)

i also can’t recommend gentle stretching enough. the key for me is organized, elaborate and complex. doing intentioned things that just really keep me stimulated. doesn’t have to be structured but has to be complex. i like researched sets of stretches for releasing trauma from the body. if you like tik tok, the account humangarage has so much free information about body regulation stretches. it’s ok if art is for both now and later and you can live in it and also let it be a long haul but believe me when i say i have a lot of empathy and know how hard it can be to find the peace and then to protect it.

it helps me to have physical painting books and to do measured practices of drawings. if you’re a painter like me, it’s bargue drawing. what you want to do though is familiarize yourself with which parts of the brain you’re engaging. i notice the part od my brain that spirals has no affect on the outcome of my work. this is hard to describe. but basically it’s like because thinking sad thoughts doesn’t make my work better or worse, it comforts me greatly to know i can be patient with myself anc let myself have those thoughts and then release them. like there are other patterns under those patterns. also doing other things while painting, beats on or a cooking show or informative pithy documentaries work best for me. my favorites are about neuroscience because then i feel like i’m asking more questions about my brain and not trying to define myself by the practice; reminded of my bigger humanity and not trying to quantify myself by the painting i am working on. hope some of this helps, take what resonates.

@birdbrain, thank you so much for your input! This really does help a lot. I never thought about some of the stuff I struggle with in the ways you’ve laid it out, so I truly do appreciate that!

I’m right there with you. All the things that I love and enjoy I can no longer do so I am in the process of finding new activities that bring me joy. It’s a horrible feeling to not have something you enjoy in life.