Struggling with an Autism Diagnosis

Yes. I was diagnosed very late in life (25), at first I was like, "wow, my life has some context now." Come to find out that I was indeed tested as a child and did fall on the spectrum. But I was raised like any other kid. When I asked why I didn't have any intervention, why I was allowed to cut myself and attempt suicide as a teenager, why I never knew how to verbally articulate my thoughts or emotions, and why to this day she calls me "abusive" when I open my mouth. Its ruined my relationship with my family and now I have zero support. It's physically painful to feel like everyone hates you. Like you're retarded, and your perceptual issues make you unlovable. I wish I never sought a diagnosis.

My relief came in the form of knowing that I wasn’t alone, and that I didn’t have to conform to standards that did not suit me. However, I relate a lot to what you’re saying about the feelings associated with navigating resources. There’s a lot of deficit language surrounding many neurodivergencies, and it feels like the needs of autistic adults is one of many that gets swept under the rug. It can be very overwhelming to realize that the supports we need simply do not exist in the neurotypical world. I’m coming back around to the idea of community and learning how to offer my strengths and get help in places I struggle. That offers some solace. But seeing as socializing is an area that is hugely affected by my autistic brain, I still feel bummed out about how my needs will be met. It doesn’t always look great, but at least we have each other to lean on and explore different ideas with.

I felt that way at first when I thought that it could be a possibility. And I came to terms with it very early on because my son has ASD and so I've already been in and around it so I know what kind of what it's like. That being said, having a name to put to my symptoms made me feel better because i finally have a way to treat my symptoms. Reach out if you wanna chat :)

I feel like this too. Mostly because me and everyone else in my life knows I'm autistic but we can't get a professional diagnosis because I'm very high-functioning (a lot of people don't like that label but I literally don't know how else to describe myself I'm sorry!), I'm a woman, and the process is just long and expensive. I mostly just feel a sense of hurt when people say they're proud to be autistic but I'm not. It makes my life way harder than it needs to be.

A lot feel relief, but they also feel horrible they never noticed sooner. At least that’s how I felt when I found out, but I also hear a majority of others say the same thing.