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Bunn3y

660d

Does any other person with “childhood” (more so 13-15) trauma struggle to remember what happened as you age? I often hear about people forgetting what happened to them when it happened and remembering it as they become an adult; however I used to remember so vividly what happened and now as an adult I can barely recall. Maybe it’s because I’ve worked on moving on but apart of me kind of wishes I still had them just to ease my imposter syndrome y’a know.

    • burgersoup

      659d

      i agree. in the midst of my trauma and shortly after i forgot a lot, and the ages and times specific things happened got harder to track. it wasn't until i went to therapy and talked about it with my partner that things started to come back together.

    • NyQuill

      659d

      Within psychology research itself, the question of repressed memories or false memory has been a big topic within cognitive psychology. The research does point that the truth may be false memories, as it’s only in therapy that these memories resurface. That’s not to say no abuse happened, but the details of your memories, no matter how accurate you think they are, have been altered significantly from what actually happened. Leading questions, photographs, even different sounds can alter the way you remember things. Again, abuse does happen, and going to therapy is important to work through that trauma, so share that with a therapist, but they won’t be likely to ask many questions due to the creation of false memories

      • Anura

        659d

        @NyQuill I'm not certain but I believe OP was actually referring to the opposite of recovered memories - having a clear memory of the trauma when it's newer but losing that memory as time goes on. Personally I can be certain my therapist didn't draw anything out of me when I reported, as first I mentioned it unprompted to my family, which is what caused them to report it to her and her to ask me what happened. I personally feel like reporting my trauma made me feel like I could let go of the details, because it wasn't entirely my burden to carry anymore. At least that's my best theory, because as I said, I have significant memory loss surrounding the incident and the following years, when I was suffering intensely from mental illness. I have a lot of quality memories from much earlier childhood years. OP can correct me if I'm wrong though, it's just the impression I got from the post using my own experience

        • Bunn3y

          659d

          @Anura yes that is what I meant!! Also I feel like you hit it perfectly - after telling people, the more I actually like analyzed what happened and “resolved” it with a therapist the more I forgot what actually happened. Talking about it allowed me to let it go I guess so it’s not so much in the front of my mind. Also from what you mentioned with mental illness !! I suppose leaving trauma untreated for so long obviously worsened depression and such … which can result in pretty significant memory loss.

    • Anura

      659d

      (content warning for SA) Yes, it happened when I was 10 and I didn't talk about it until 13. At that time, I gave a detailed explanation to my therapist about what happened, which matches what I later heard from my abuser's other victims. By adulthood I had forgotten all of it, except the events that led up to the assault (the grooming and related things from earlier that day). My therapist read my description back to me and I was surprised to hear a lot of it. Now it's more like seeing a photo or video of your childhood from a time too young to remember, where you know it happened and that you were the one who experienced it, but you've lost the firsthand knowledge of what it was like. I hope this answer could be helpful in some way 💚

      • Anura

        659d

        @Anura Also, I should say the feeling of being an imposter or a liar from not remembering it properly is a huge emotional burden, and I'm sorry you're experiencing it too

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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