Splitting on my therapist and friend

I split on my therapist last night. I do think I needed to find a new therapist to help me with some things my previous one couldn't help with (like coping skills, safety skills, dissociative disorders, BPD, mental illness), but I also probably shouldn't have just emailed them out of nowhere and said I'm discontinuing therapy. I know having a conversation with them about if we could have adjusted something or if I needed to find care with someone else would have been better, but last night that felt like way too much and I just needed it to be over so I split on them. I've been kind of in a crisis and I tend to split on people. I'm also kind of splitting on one of my newer friends, but trying not to. What do you do when you split on someone? Should I still talk to my therapist? Is it okay if I split on them if I kind of needed to leave anyways?

Your answer

Starry_leek

2y ago

If you feel like you're not splitting on people for healthy reasons the best thing I would say to do is distance yourself, tell whoever you need space right now until you feel more neutral and know if you actually do hate them or if you're just splitting. It's hard and people might reach out to ask why you're suddenly distancing yourself but it's better than saying or doing something you'll later regret if you do still want to have a connection

Ren.exe

2y ago

Yeah. This is a good idea. Like maybe also just saying hey I'm dealing with mental illness things right now so they kinda know what's up/don't think I'm ghosting them or whatever.

mintyhyunjin

2y ago

If you needed to leave, then no, don't continue talking to them. It's ok to spilt on people. I do it all the time. Its not something you can help

Ren.exe

2y ago

Yeah. I think it was right to leave. I wish I had maybe split on them a bit gentler but I honestly don't know how to do that.

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