Share your stories with me!

My story... Pretty much I have always had anxiety and some form of depression, but I never knew it until I was an adult. It took my loving husband, who had seen his mother go through the same, to mention it. Through the years my anxiety has gotten worse, especially after having children. They are my life, but parenting is hard and it causes me so much anxiety. And my anxiety leads to my depression. My depression goes in waves and is usually worse when my anxiety is worse. I am basically a ball of emotion. Do people like me? What if I screw this up? Am I ruining my children? Does my husband still love me? Am I annoying my friends? I am a failure. I am boring. I am worthless. I have a pretty amazing life. Amazing kids, home, husband, friends, family.. yet my anxiety and depression won't let me fully be happy. It sucks.

I've had anxiety as far as my memories go back, but didn't have a name for it until my teen years. I was officially diagnosed in college when I started seeing a therapist (as well as PTSD). My mom always said I was too sensitive, dramatic, etc., all the lovely words used for women when we are overwhelmed or outspoken. I kind of had a breaking point in college and a friend convinced me to try therapy. 4 years and multiple medications later, my depression is mostly under control. Anxiety is still an uphill battle, but I've also had a lot of stressors recently while changing careers, moving, etc. I've learned to never invalidate your own feelings, they're all important and there's nothing wrong with feeling them in a healthy way. Always take time to yourself and set boundaries.

My story could be a novel lol. But in short and sweet words il just say, it's a Rollercoaster ride for me. I do have a hard time going places. I get anxiety triggers when I go into stores. So I have to make that quick, sometimes my muscles are so tense it pains me. 😫. But I do take hydroxazine as needed for moments like going some places. It helps to chill me out a bit.

I don't have social anxiety per se, but I have a crowd anxiety. Shoulder to shoulder stuff. Forget going to pro sporting events. It gets to the point where I feel like if one more person bumps into me or I feel I can't get out, I could punch someone. But, mostly I just want to crouch down, cover my head and scream. That's one of my stories It's kind of a vague thing to ask for stories about aniety. No offense meant.