Struggling with Self-Destructive Behaviors After Sexual Assault

I was SA a year ago and have yet to be in a relationship or have sex since. I have my triggers but my behaviors were self harm. It was all very confusing and shameful to me. I was lucky to be going into ED treatment shortly after. I still haven’t confronted the ptsd of the assault . My therapist and I are making a plan to address it in a safe way. Maybe that would work for you too.

I have the same experience unfortunately, I was sexually abused as a baby to a young child (not in adulthood though). It's because we subconsciously think our only worth is sexually. We think that the only way we can be valued, worthy, or have a relationship (of any kind not just romantic) we have to be of value to them and because we were conditioned from childhood and from such a young age to see our sex as being worthy of attention or love, we seek that out as adults because we want to feel worthy and loved and our brains only understand one way to be worth that. It takes a lot of unlearning and reconditioning yourself to consciously realize that your worth does not come from sex or your body, it comes from within and who you are. Hope this helps, but just know you're not alone ❤️

I did this for many years as well and I was also in a similar situation being SA by many people over the years. I think it’s part of being traumatized. I’m always here to talk if you need someone who understands