Struggling with Self Harm Addiction

I recently am realizing I think I’m like addicted to self harm. I have tried all of the things like snapping a rubber band, ice, exercise. I gave myself tattoos until I a couple got infected, I even picked up boxing. I was clean for awhile a few years ago but I cannot stop again. I feel so much shame over it and the scars. But it really does always make me feel better and calms me down and nothing else does. But I know if I told any of my loved ones about it I know they love me so they would be horrified. I want to stop for them. I’m afraid I’ll get found out. I’m just starting to admit this is a problem. Does anyone have any other method instead of injury that actually works as a good replacement?