Seeking Advice on Borderline Personality Disorder Diagnosis and Medication

Hey there! While I have not been actually diagnosed with BPD, I am interested in making an appointment somewhere to find the proper dx for me (even if it happens to be something else). I really think I do have BPD, because I have highs and lows, I can become very irritable easily, I am very passionate and then very depressed for periods of time, I also have always had a paranoia that people close to me will do something against me or I don't fully trust them. Sometimes, I absolutely love my husband and then he will do or say something that sets me off, and then I just wanna divorce him, when realistically I love him and do not wanna leave him at all. Does anyone have any ideas on where I should schedule an appointment? Which medications should I talk to my doctor about if I am BPD? Anything that comes to mind regarding your experience with BPD, I would like to read about it.