Preparing for Parenthood with Autism

I think what scares me about having kids and being autistic is the playing aspect and some texture things I don’t think I could handle. I often wonder if I’m cut out for it, or if it would change Because it’s my kid. Try Twitter #actuallyautistic and look for autistic parents on there. I figure part of the battle if I have someone with me who understands it wouldn’t be so bad. Like maybe my partner could take the tags and stickers off of all the stuff so it doesn’t gross me out. I guess as parents it’s 50/50 for care so maybe find things your partner can do that you can’t and vice versa. Biggest thing. Find other autistic adults, have a good support system.

I truly think it will make me a better parent! But I know I may struggle with the strong smells, wet and sticky textures they interact with for sensory learning, and the screaming. I’m most concerned about the screaming. I’ve decided I will have headphones and other noise reducing tech, and having a partner or family member able to help with the stuff that overwhelms me will help prevent meltdowns in me. Ultimately you can try to ask yourself if there’s things you anticipate that will be triggers and how you will manage them before they come home. Other than that you also will need to review if they are working throughout the process and if any new things are triggering, plan for those as they come up. Communicate all of this to whoever you are parenting with too so they also are prepared to step in and understand why. It’s totally doable and I think our strong imaginations and excitability make it easier for us to relate to kids. We understand the importance of having special hobbies and interests. We understand the signs of overwhelm and that we need to take moments to self-sooth. We understand the importance of *supportive* socialization. We will know to pass these on. One day the smells, the unpleasant sensory experiences, and screaming will end! ❤️

What do you mean exactly? Which aspects are you worried about, being overstimulated by being around kids, struggling with understanding them, or other issues? For whatever you're worried about I would recommend taking the time to be around children as much as you can before you have your own (and I would recommend this to any potential parent neurodivergent or neurotypical) and learn what your struggles are and then working in those independent areas. I was similarly worried about my conditions affecting my ability to have kids, but found that not only did they have little interference, but they often allowed me to understand children's needs and thought processes in ways other adults couldn't.