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birlarks

462d

i have someone i really like, that I'm kinda in a relationship with, but my ocd is making me really struggle with it. To the point of nausea if things don't feel perfectly "just right" (an unattainable standard with no actual things to judge it by.) It makes it me extremely high strung and the whole experience exhausting despite how much i care for them. I really don't wanna mess things up but I'm not sure how to solve this.

Top reply
    • rustyshackleford

      462d

      I'm going to tell you what I wish someone would have told me. Don't fight the intrusive thought. Let it go through your mind, accept it, and let it go. I know it sounds counterintuitive, I thought accepting intrusive thoughts would make them come true, but it didn't. In fact, as soon as I accepted it it, it was like a light bulb went off over my head, and it was SO CLEAR how untrue those thoughts were. Fighting with them and trying to "prove them wrong" will only make them worse. I know it sounds scary, but I promise it's not! It's the ONLY thing that ever gave me enough relief to get to the point that I could mange my OCD

    • rustyshackleford

      462d

      I'm going to tell you what I wish someone would have told me. Don't fight the intrusive thought. Let it go through your mind, accept it, and let it go. I know it sounds counterintuitive, I thought accepting intrusive thoughts would make them come true, but it didn't. In fact, as soon as I accepted it it, it was like a light bulb went off over my head, and it was SO CLEAR how untrue those thoughts were. Fighting with them and trying to "prove them wrong" will only make them worse. I know it sounds scary, but I promise it's not! It's the ONLY thing that ever gave me enough relief to get to the point that I could mange my OCD

    • Eren2273

      462d

      Do you mind if I ask what your OCD is causing to feel not "just right"?

      • birlarks

        462d

        @Eren2273 I'm not sure specifically, just that if I'm spending time with them there's this itch to fix something like the one I get if denying a compulsion.

        • Eren2273

          462d

          @birlarks if you don't do this already, I recommend not obsessing over the thought and just leaving it be. Is it possible that your partner is the trigger for it (I don't mean that in a bad way), because it happens when you're around them? If you think it's possible, it might also be good to consider what could be the reason. It can be easier to deal with when you know your triggers

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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