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NickyBear

480d

Last year a month after my 26th birthday, my mom went to wake me up for my follow up appointment from a foot surgery I had a week prior. Although I have my own place I moved back in with my mom temporarily so she could help me recover. But moving on… the day of my follow up appointment my mom came to wake me. She found me cold and unconscious in my bed. She immediately called paramedics they rushed me to the hospital. Upon arrival I suffered a heart attack and it lead to my heart and organs shutting down. They performed cpr for 20 min with no luck.. but one nurse said to try one more time.. and thanks to god and everyone’s prayers I gained a rhythm back and I was rushed to the icu where I was intubated and placed in an induced coma for a week. My fiancé, the man who claims to love me, the man who promised me I could depend on him for anything was absent. I spent three weeks and some change in the hospital. My fiancé showed up on two occasions and spent a total of 30 min with me. Im home now we’ll my moms home. My fiancé keeps trying to make me feel bad. I can’t help what happened to me nor can I change it. I’ve tried to explain to him that a relationship is 50/50 but currently I don’t have the strength to do things on my own. I really need 100/0 right now but he says he’s to busy and tired. We’ve been together five years and not once did he shed a tear or even ask or acknowledge what was going on. Im not about to apologize for my heart attack nor the fact that im a very sick person. From day one I was honest with him about my health … now im debating if to throw away my five year relationship or continue in a relationship with someone who I honestly feel wants to be free..

Top reply
    • NickyBear

      461d

      Hi everyone just wanted to update you guys . As of last night I officially moved my stuff out of the apartment that I shared with my now ex fiancé. And yes I took my puppy especially after my exes mom threatened to throw her in a shelter. And I’ve become friends with someone who has been by my side and honestly doing everything in his power to make sure I’m ok. A lot of people will say that I need to be single for a while but the truth is .. out of the five years I was with my ex… I spent the last three of those years alone. Oh and also his mom decided to come out snd show her true colors by insulting my mom multiple times yesterday. Things got so bad we had too call the sheriffs office just for protection in case she tried to start a fight. And no I’m not keeping my engagement ring… I will be pawning it and saving the money for a well deserved vacation with my new friend and my puppy. And shout out to my mother who went above and beyond for me today. She really didn’t have to but I appreciate that she did ❤️

    • NickyBear

      461d

      Hi everyone just wanted to update you guys . As of last night I officially moved my stuff out of the apartment that I shared with my now ex fiancé. And yes I took my puppy especially after my exes mom threatened to throw her in a shelter. And I’ve become friends with someone who has been by my side and honestly doing everything in his power to make sure I’m ok. A lot of people will say that I need to be single for a while but the truth is .. out of the five years I was with my ex… I spent the last three of those years alone. Oh and also his mom decided to come out snd show her true colors by insulting my mom multiple times yesterday. Things got so bad we had too call the sheriffs office just for protection in case she tried to start a fight. And no I’m not keeping my engagement ring… I will be pawning it and saving the money for a well deserved vacation with my new friend and my puppy. And shout out to my mother who went above and beyond for me today. She really didn’t have to but I appreciate that she did ❤️

    • NickyBear

      472d

      Apparently I was holding him back and he didn’t want to be responsible For me my health or my heart

    • NickyBear

      472d

      Thanks everyone for your kind words.. not only did he dump me today but also threatened to take my puppy from me. I’m still with my mom and will be moving back home with my mom until I can get back on my feet

      • DogWhisperer

        470d

        @NickyBear Hope you get to keep puppy. Puppy will help with anxiety ❤️ Worry about you and feel better ❤️

    • CoffeeAndDogs

      477d

      Better to have "wasted" 5 years than to throw away a lifetime with someone who is unsupportive and uncaring.

    • dolphinblues

      477d

      I am so sorry you are going through this! Thank goodness for that nurse! I am so glad she spoke up and you are alive and on the mend. Thank goodness for your mom too! As for your fiancé, he is a complete jerk. To not be by your side and do everything possible to help you is inexcusable. To complain about being too tired and too busy is a cop-out. He is just too self-absorbed and selfish. It shows that he will not uphold the marriage vows in sickness and in health. To make you feel bad for something completely out of your control is emotionally abusive and gaslighting. My ex did the same thing to me. I had a blood infection and pneumonia and was in the hospital for 2 weeks. He visited me twice and stayed about 20 minutes each time. He did call me every day, but it wasn't the same as coming to see/spend time with me. Every time I had something health-wise that put me out of commission, he would make me feel bad for it. Complaining about him not having time or energy to pick up the slack. Or that I wasn't as sick/hurt as I claim and I just don't want to do the housework, etc. These contributed to him being my ex. I encourage you to think about what type of relationship you want. Do you want to continue in a relationship where you are not being respected and cared for the way you deserve? I wish you well! Prayers for continued healing and clarity on what you want to do going forward.

    • DogWhisperer

      477d

      Omg im glad your mom was there for you!! I'm glad you are back with us!! I say say dump his no good for nothing lazy ass!! He ain't worth your time or ours for that matter. I'm sure there will be someone for you that will make you a priority. He is just not right for you. Definitely not good enough for the wonderful person that you are. I hope you get to feeling better. ❤️

    • Pain_Warrior89

      477d

      You have to do what's best with u. I stayed with my ex too long because "it used to be so good" it was really hard to end it but I didn't realise how unhappy he was making me, you need to make decisions on how things are now not how they used to be.i hope this helps a little

    • LaurenRomero

      478d

      If he isn’t giving you time while ur down , he’s not worth wasting it over … get rid of him

    • Fwd1982

      478d

      Get rid of ur man cause if he really cared about u he would of been there with u next to u all the time i had an overdose about 6 yrs ago and my best friend that is a guy came to see me everyday and stayed with me all day long he even slept on the couch next to my bed

    • Hamster99

      478d

      Get rid of that man

    • Gwen71

      478d

      I'm so glad that nurse told them to revive you one more time. As to your fiance,I would ( in my opinion) break it off with him. I hope you are feeling better🙏

    • HocusFocus

      479d

      Bull crap he's a good guy. He let you go through that alone. A good guy wouldn't have. It take seven years to change a study say. Good for not letting him back. It was 7 years in 2020 but still. I agree with that last part.

    • Taylor128

      480d

      I was in a situation kind of like this but def. Not to the extent you've gone through. I was with a guy for maybe a year and i found out i was pregnant - we thought i had a miscarriage and we ended up breaking up after that. Then i found out i was having an ectopic pregnancy and had to be rushed to the hospital for emergency surgery - if i waited any longer i could have died. I lost my right fallopian tube . When i was recovering in the hospital for a few days he didn't come see me a single time. That was back in 2013 & a frw years ago he wanted to try and get back together but i wasn't having it at all - even though hes a good guy- that situation really hurt. --i am so sorry you have gone through what you have and that someone you've been with for so long, didn't act like a good partner should . Please consider yourself and the things you need and the things you feel you deserve , if you continue to not get it from him than it may be better to move on.

    • HocusFocus

      480d

      Sounds like a miracle. Thank God for that nurse. Ass. Even some of my worst guys at least showed up! Too busy and tired? From what? He's not by your side! The only one that can use that hexcuse is your mom! That's not love. I've known my guy six years, we started dating this year. He's always there when I need him. Always. You shouldn't have to apologize that you had a heart attack or are sick. My roommate currently helps me out since my guy is in the UK. He'll even spot me to make sure I don't slip in the shower and we're not even together. Trust me. I've learned the hard way that if someone won't be there for you when you need it? It may be hard but it's better to cut them out of your life. A real guy who really loves you will ALWAYS be there for you. I literally just have to tell my guy I need him and even from the UK he pretty much almost immediately, or up to an hour, gets on and asks what's wrong. He'll stay up til 4am his time for me just because he loves me. That's real love. Real love makes you constantly feel special, safe and loved. Is there for the good and the bad and isn't 50/50 really. Sometimes it leans more your way and sometimes more his way but you're always there for each other and that's the 50/50 part. You're not only giving and he's not only taking. Sometimes you need help and sometimes he needs help. Surround yourself with those who truly love you. You have three already. That's a start. If ClaireAngel, your mom and I didn't care? We wouldn't be here. It's weird, I sense something about that nurse. She must be a true angel or have some high spiritual connection, I think. I just have a feeling. You can talk to me and you have your mom. She wouldn't have let you move in if she didn't love you. ClaireAngel is right. That guy is an ass. He doesn't truly love you if he doesn't put you first. When my now ex fiance had a seizure, I was right next to him. I was bawling because we'd just gotten into a fight. His family was saying all this crap about me and didn't want me to see him. His mom let me. She knew I needed to and respected that we were engaged. That's love. You deserve better. True love. True love will always spoil you with or without reason. My guy, Alex, says that he can't be with me but when he is I'll get massages and spoils. That's love. And heaven lol.

    • ClaireAngel

      480d

      I'm sorry but he sounds like a complete arsehole who isn't with you for the right reasons. Gosh when I've been in hospital my then boyfriend (now hubby) used to stay on a hospital chair next to me!!! If I was you I would move on because you deserve better than this.

      11

      • mamabear1990

        472d

        @ClaireAngel same granted it was for birth inductions and giving birth but my body is slow so my partner stayed in hospital with me for as long as possible and slept in the chairs when the nurse would allow (it's against the rules where I am) so I wouldn't be alone when I gave birth This partner being spoken about sounds like a right twat

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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