Man ive been there so many times. Theres something unique and special about those relationships bc you're with someone who understands the level of despair and pain we go through that bonds us unlike other couples. BUT it def makes symptoms worse sometimes and it's easy for me to fall into a toxic dynamic. It's a tough situation for me.

He truly is my soulmate and we are learning to understand each other’s lows and highs but it is such an uphill battle sometimes. It’s like our anxiety feeds off each other but at the same time we are such a good team. It’s so hard when he has his lows. His come more often than mine and he is opening up about them more but it’s still hard because we both have our own crap we deal with. We both have that voice in our heads lying to us you know?

Completely understand. You aren't alone in this and these struggles do not mean you won't work out with your soul mate. Honestly, maybe a conversation with him about this would help. I'm not in your relationship so I don't know. But I am wishing you guys all of the best

I completely understand. My husband has depression and anxiety and I suffer from Bipolar 1 and Borderline personality disorder. It is a different struggle. We've been together 8 year this November. Married for 5 in May. Other people who don't suffer, don't understand our struggles. So I'm very careful who I go to for advice. I will say it's rewarding. We are there for each other when no one else is

We can be very reactionary people. With the Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria that comes as part of my ADHD-C package, OMG I get this so much. The root of communication needs work and communication can be very difficult for us when we’re keyed up. It makes it hard for us to listen to understand when we feel like we’ve experienced a rejection. And it sucks because our Logic can be sitting there going “Hellooooo” but nope! RSD has yanked the wheel from Jesus and going right for all the parts of the road you don’t want. So, when both of y’all are feeling a bit more on even ground for some communication, this might be a great opportunity to try to start cultivating ways for y’all to handle conflicts more constructively. Like, trying to identify at what point it’s best to take a break rather than hamster-wheeling in futility; trying to identify “ok, it’s at [x] point I start to feel [y] and maybe I/you/we could try [z] and see how that works” Or whatever ways y’all can think of to try to protect y’all’s respect for each other as much as possible when things get dicey. These are things I and my 3 teenagers have been working on together for a while and it’s really been helping. Learning to communicate (talk and listen) constructively is tough all around, but if all parties involved are trying, it will really help mitigate how much the reactionary stuff can clash and make tornadoes, so to speak. Sorry if I rambled too much and I hope I made sense 😅😅😅 Communicating effectively has never been my forte 😅😅😅

Thank you soooo much!!! It’s so on point! One thing that we are working on right now is stopping his spirals. He can get one bad thought about anything and then suddenly he thinks that everything o say or do is against him. Now I try and just give him space to get himself calmed down but it sometimes doesn’t happen and that’s our night. Meanwhile I start my own bad thought spiral about maybe I’m not a good partner and I start feeling guilty even though logically I have done nothing wrong. He can be down right mean at times when this happens. Accusing me of seeking drugs or talking to somebody who I used to do drugs with. Saying that I don’t want to be a mother and I’m just using him because I don’t do anything, which is all in true. It just gets so hard for me. Thank you so much for sharing with me because I really needed to know that I’m not alone in this