Love/Hate Relationship with Summer Break

yk why i have a love/hate relationship with summer break? bc after a bit i start feeling depressed again…mainly bc me isolating comes back, then i start to slowly fall into this deep pit of emotional numb cycle till it starts to get to much and i want to cry for having to do the same exact thing rhe next day. why don’t i change something up? i cant- im working 5 days a week for 8hrs a day, sometimes more. i just need the first day of college to come a bit faster yk?