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audRei

710d

i was diagnosed with osdd 1a (by a psychiatrist who didnt even believe in dissociation) in 2018 and then DID in 2022. i dont have any contact with the "system" and the community surrounding did and osdd on social media is just... yikes. it's impossible to talk about or even just tell people i have osdd/DID or else i face harassment and discrimination. the last time i revealed myself to someone in my personal life it turned into two months of hell. id like to see what dissociation is like for other people, as well as how you manage to deal with it! my biggest problem is forgetting what im saying/thinking/doing while im doing it -- this is a big problem while at work or in therapy.

Top reply
    • Ghost_Cat

      710d

      Hiya! 1B system here. I never fully lose my memory (other than occasional brief moments) but traumatic areas of my life are incredibly blurry and fuzzy when I try to recall them. When I dissociate in the moment, it starts with feeling "spacey" and then escalates into feelings of depersonalization/derealization. It feels like moving through a fog constantly where it's hard to focus on anything or even speak sometimes. Switching actually helps alleviate the dissociation for us because then someone is actually doing the things we need to instead of the body just sitting there like 🧍. Dissociation is different for everyone but that's a bit of what it's like for me!

    • Ghost_Cat

      710d

      Hiya! 1B system here. I never fully lose my memory (other than occasional brief moments) but traumatic areas of my life are incredibly blurry and fuzzy when I try to recall them. When I dissociate in the moment, it starts with feeling "spacey" and then escalates into feelings of depersonalization/derealization. It feels like moving through a fog constantly where it's hard to focus on anything or even speak sometimes. Switching actually helps alleviate the dissociation for us because then someone is actually doing the things we need to instead of the body just sitting there like 🧍. Dissociation is different for everyone but that's a bit of what it's like for me!

    • Lavan

      710d

      I fall under 1b. So I don't really experience amnesia except with one part that isn't connected to the system. That I know of anyhow. For me it manifests mostly in depersonalization when under heavy stress and derealization when the stress doesn't ease up. Though I do have gaps of forgetting what I'm saying or doing, but I usually attribute that to ADHD. When those happen I just ask the person I'm with for a recall point. Or what I said last. It usually kick starts the conversation back into gear. Sorry that the last time you came out didn't go well. I'm glad you're here though. Welcome! ❤️

    • RamiStory

      710d

      I'm having alot of the same issues which is why I downloaded the app I also have 1a I was just diagnosed recently but I'm not too sure what is and isn't from the disorder for me I know I don't remember alot of shit and that I find weird things written in my notes sometimes I have regress when I'm stressed out and I zone out alot in conversation and find it hard to come back to sometimes but those are the only things I know for sure are from osdd tbh if you need a friend tho Im here I'm sorry about those experiences you had when you tried to open up to people sending good energy to you 💖

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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