Lack of ADHD Management in Childhood

I'm sort of going through this. I have all sorts of unprocessed trauma, severe anxiety, depressive episodes, and ADD. My parents "were" emotionally abusive and neglectful and refused to ever take me to a therapist or any sort of help. I ended up having to drop out of school, and lost my chance at my dream career. I spent my teen years locked in my room, alone, without proper socialization. Now I have So. Much. STUFF. that I'm trying to work through in and out of therapy. I'm so angry that I didn't get the help I needed when I was a kid. If I had, I think things would be a lot different in terms of my mental health.

I was diagnosed at 6 or 7. My parents were hesitant about giving me pills but ultimately went with it. Mom said it was like night and day with me. She was a nurse and researched about the ADHD. I struggled but mom tried giving me the tools to succeed. I had so many problems. Few friends, bullied, left out of games, the usual. We had it under control and then my mom died of a brain tumor. So now I'm left trying to figure how to manage it all myself. After her death my symptoms of ADHD and anxiety got worse and it is much more docile to handle.

I was given Adderall at 14 but never told I had ADD. no one ever gave me any tools besides neurotypical ones that didn't help. I still struggle a lot

Also, of you're feeling lonely I highly recommend going to the YouTube channel How To ADHD and read the comments

Jellybean I'm so sorry about your experience, it sounds miserable and extremely frustrating. You are definitely NOT alone. While I have ADD/ADHD only mildly, my husband has it pretty severely. I didn't know until just last year (he was in denial) and even I, his own wife didn't realize how much of his behavior is because of the way his brain works. He didn't either. He was never given the tools and ways to cope, and he could not hold a job. I had a baby and quit my job and we literally couldn't pay rent so we had to move out. If my family didn't live so nearby and invite us in, we would have been homeless. And my mom said she wouldn't have let us live with her if it wasn't for my baby. That was roughly a year ago and she probably wouldn't say that now because at the time she also didn't understand how much of my husband's behavior is because of the ADHD.

i was diagnosed at maybe 8 or 9 and immediately started taking adderall for a few years before switching to no medication but then realized i literally couldn’t succeed in school without medication so i had to go on Ritalin and now im on vyvanse. i can’t do a lot without my medication and i’ve always felt like there could’ve been more done to help me manage but now i just feel useless without medication. i’ve always would like to know other ways to manage because without medication i can’t focus, remember anything, or stay still for long. i fixed the fidgeting problem with playdough (only stim toy that works for me for now) but still, all the other problems are so difficult to manage because doctor’s only solutions are to give us pills. it sucks, just know you aren’t alone and this is a rather unfortunate world for people who are neurodivergent