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Bluefire

214d

I just wanted to ask something kind of weird. If anyone understands what I'm asking here, how do you make yourself LIKE yourself?

Top reply
    • AnimalBoy

      109d

      Usually you start with getting to know yourself and beginning to feel neutral about yourself, remind yourself that you're a person and people deserve to have their basic needs met regardless of who they are. If you're unlearning self hatred or a discomfort with yourself its important to instead of forcing yourself to like yourself right out of the bat and start making boundaries, like you dont have to like yourself but hating yourself is unproductive and not tending to your own needs is unhealthy. Then work on stopping behaviors that affect you negatively like self deprecating humor, even sarcastically it can still make a serious difference in your own self esteem. Then start working on acceptance of things about yourself you can't change and/or are harmless. After that is where I'd start aiming for self positivity

    • AnimalBoy

      109d

      Usually you start with getting to know yourself and beginning to feel neutral about yourself, remind yourself that you're a person and people deserve to have their basic needs met regardless of who they are. If you're unlearning self hatred or a discomfort with yourself its important to instead of forcing yourself to like yourself right out of the bat and start making boundaries, like you dont have to like yourself but hating yourself is unproductive and not tending to your own needs is unhealthy. Then work on stopping behaviors that affect you negatively like self deprecating humor, even sarcastically it can still make a serious difference in your own self esteem. Then start working on acceptance of things about yourself you can't change and/or are harmless. After that is where I'd start aiming for self positivity

    • enbypup

      109d

      some things that have helped me: -stop making self depreciating jokes. -self neutrality/tolerance is a step before self love. you can't just expect yourself to jump to the top of a staircase when you're starting at the very bottom. -knowing I wouldn't treat my friends the way I treat myself. i should be a friend to myself too, because no matter what happens, I'll always be with myself. i should enjoy my own company. -you can love yourself and still be frustrated at times. I love myself, but don't have to 24/7/365. there will always be bumps in the road and frustrations, but don't let those set you back. i love myself and my body and mind and all it does for me. my hands let me pet my cat, my feet take me to rehearsal. but I can still be upset and frustrated that I have chronic pain -small joys and small wins: reading a book. listening to music you like. enjoy the little moments with yourself. this isn't a cure all, but it's about steps. baby steps are still steps ❤️

    • Samalander

      194d

      Start with tolerating yourself. Treat yourself like you’d treat any other human. Self care is usually made out to be *happy* and *positive*, when in reality it’s getting down in the dirt of who you are, and pulling out the weeds. It’s gonna hurt. Getting better and starting to tolerate yourself will hurt because you’re so used to setting up for failure so you won’t get hurt. It’s all about stepping out of your comfort zone, because comfort kills. It kills your motivation, your outlook, and any opportunity you may have to grow. It’s so so so hard! I won’t lie to you! But to make a promise to yourself to someday be on the other side of hurt is a big promise to make, and it’ll be a light of encouragement on your darkest days. I feel kinda preachy. One thing that bugs me about talking to people who are suffering like I used to, before I began healing, is that when I was there, in the darkest times, their words felt like mockery. They couldn’t possibly know what it’s like, they’re so happy wappy and sappy and it’s not the same! But the truth is hard to accept: that these people who try to reach down to your depths, really do care. Maybe about you, maybe they see themself in you. Sorry, I got rambly. Basically, just take it slow because it’s gonna hurt re-feeling your feelings. You may have pushed something way far down that comes back up once you start allowing yourself to be yourself. I had that happen, and I had to stay at the hospital for about a week to fix my meds to allow my brain to handle the information it was processing.

    • Zebrapotato37659

      195d

      Try talking about yourself as you would a friend and taking care of yourself as you would a friend :) God loves you no matter what

      • Bluefire

        162d

        @Zebrapotato37659 you're so sweet, God bless

    • bytch

      196d

      Im still learning for me its an everyday thing. I hate myself for my past and everything.

      • Zebrapotato37659

        161d

        @bytch Ask God to forgive you and He will forgive it. And eventually you’ll be able to forgive yourself. Prayers!

      • Bluefire

        162d

        @bytch Can't change the past, can only choose the frame. I rec the songs "Tattoos" and "Reason to Live" by Citizen Soldier, they helped me with not feeling so guilty for past trauma

    • Dusty7850

      204d

      I have no idea. I'm 45, & I literally don't remember ever liking myself.

      • Zebrapotato37659

        161d

        @Dusty7850 Prayers! God is with you always and loves you!

      • Bluefire

        197d

        @Dusty7850 oof. Sorry to hear

    • Kittypup

      204d

      I have no idea

    • JessMartin

      212d

      This is a hard question for me, I am still trying to figure it out. Maybe try doing things you like to enjoy yourself every now and then.

    • Gaer

      214d

      Find something you like about you. I like my blue eyes, I like my personality, my character, and my sense of humor. Start with that

      • Bluefire

        213d

        @Gaer I suppose I can comment on my eyes and my writing skills to myself perhaps. It's mainly harder with physical looks and feeling like my relationships with others is burdening so I feel like I'm awful. Thank you for the short yet helpful advice tho, made me remember I do like my blue eyes. 💙

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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One way to start liking yourself is by getting in touch with your physical sensations and noting everything you feel. Writing down traits and idiosyncrasies that make you unique can also help. Another method is making a list of positive traits about yourself, such as being considerate or good at cooking. It's important to be honest with yourself and remember that no one is truly useless. You could also try self-acceptance, starting with neutral statements like "I am a human being." Practicing self-care and listening to your body can also foster self-love. Lastly, expressing gratitude for your body and its functions can help develop a relationship with yourself.

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