Hey! Figured I'd check in when I saw this-- 2022 actually marks 10 years in eating disorder recovery for me! I'm fully recovered now but I can remember these fears like they were yesterday. You're not alone-- disordered eating is so darn common, and it doesn't help that the diet industry normalizes restriction in awful ways...so try not to focus on the fact that you don't "have" an eating disorder. Oftentimes, disordered eating habits are the springboard for a full-blown spiral, but you do NOT want to get to rock bottom before addressing this. 🙏 I definitely recommend finding some safe foods to have on hand. If you're struggling with meals or want to make up for restriction earlier in the day, then at least you have stuff on hand that's comfortable and easy to grab! For me, this was often protein bars (I love Luna, Quest, Fig Bars, Kind bars), apples w/ peanut butter, Ensure supplements, or hummus & carrot sticks. Try to get a variety of nutrients in, even if it's a small snack! But as you probably know, disordered eating issues are rarely about food OR our appearance. Dig deeper... there are TONS of ideas for journal entries on Pinterest & guided workbooks on amazon. If you enjoy restorative yoga or meditation, maybe set aside time for that each day? If you can slow down the fears in your mind & begin to identify your "broken records" of negative self-talk you'll begin catching them more & more often. Try to be kind to your mind AND body, and definitely be sure you're getting consistent therapy. You've got this! Your vulnerability and honesty here is a wonderful sign of hope for your eating disorder journey! 💕