Dealing with Family Estrangement and Mental Health Issues

I had to cut my family from my life. It sucks cause I still love them but they cut me out years ago

It sucks, hun. Im sorry you got this going on. I'm estranged from my parents for various reasons, but it all boils down to the fact that they won't admit to their actions, their mental illness, or work on anything. I'm pretty much alone, cause I'm autistic and I haven't figured out the whole making and keeping friends thing, especially on too of being in poverty and barely surviving to boot. I go back and forth convincing myself to try again with them, missing having family, remembering the painful parts, realizing it all will happen again if I put myself in that position. Repeat. A lot od people don't get how isolating, depressing, lonely, and stressful family estrangement can be. It's be a whole decade for me, and I struggle a lot even still. I wish I could give you a hug or comfort you in whatever you like best. I know this pain and I'm sorry. You are not alone.