Struggling with Emotional Neglect from Parents

Is there anyone else who is affected by how their parents treat them emotionally? People usually tell me "You shouldn't let them get to you, ignore them." or "Their opinion and feelings shouldn't affect you this bad". But sadly, it just does. If I try to talk to them about something that makes me happy in that moment, they just kinda brush it off with "Oh cool" and etc and change the subject without really listening to me, they sometimes wont even respond. And if I need someone to talk to if I feel lonely or depressed, I'll try to talk to them and it'll either go into an argument or they just don't seem concerned. And don't get wrong, they both have raised me well and aren't like evil, it's mainly my mother who causes me issues unfortunately, and I assume they just don't understand me and don't think I'm a normal kid since I'm 21, recently diagnosed with Autism (which they didn't believe I had) and can't drive, cook, get through work without having a panic attack, etc. I just feel like I'm alone in this and would love to hear your thoughts/advice/or anything else related to this!