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strawbrei

613d

I’m being disciplined at work for my physical and mental health issues before I got the chance to get accommodations or legal protection. My entire life so far has been a constant battle between tolerating mistreatment and tentatively advocating for myself. For the most part, my various traumas have left me with a lot of empathy and patience, and I am working towards becoming a social worker. I just entered the public health field at a company that is renowned for inclusion and disability awareness. And yet, my supervisors and managers are taking advantage of the volatile situation I’m in and showing that they’re disappointed in me for not living up to the standard of others in the department who have been doing this work for longer than I’ve been alive. I’m pretty upset about this and it’s taking up so much emotional energy to stand up for myself just to be punished for having some self respect. I’ll put more context in the comments because this rant can get quite extensive, but there’s the gist of it.

Top reply
    • strawbrei

      613d

      I don’t particularly need advice or anything, I just wanted to put this out into the world without my name attached because I’m feeling very guilty for constantly ranting to my family and friends about this

    • strawbrei

      613d

      I don’t particularly need advice or anything, I just wanted to put this out into the world without my name attached because I’m feeling very guilty for constantly ranting to my family and friends about this

    • strawbrei

      613d

      ADHD is the biggest obstacle of the moment. so much is happening in my life, I can’t make my brain shut up so I can focus on meeting the productivity expectation at work. my diagnosis is still technically unofficial several years after I first brought it up to my psychiatrist, because I was never able to set up a neuropsych evaluation (side note: I’ve done a ton of research on adult ADHD and why it is so badly misunderstood even by professionals). this is to say that my support structure is flimsy as hell. I wrestled through high school with little to no help (bad call that almost killed me multiple times), and then throughout college I tried so hard to advocate for myself, but to no almost no avail. I’ll spare you the details. now I’m two months into my first real job, which is draining to begin with, trying to stay afloat while I gradually unpack and rearrange my room, set up my workspace and daily schedule, process a mountain of past trauma, maintain some social life, look after my family, And take care of my body. there is simply not enough time and space for all of those, and it’s easiest to neglect self care like I’ve always done. I have struggled with insomnia and disordered eating for my whole life, so it’s not a new thing that I’m not sleeping or eating enough. but it’s starting to really exacerbate my other health issues. my supervisors and manager simultaneously demand an explanation for every 10 minute period I’m away from my computer and treat all of my explanations like excuses. I have made it more than clear that my productivity is being hindered by my health, by technical difficulties, by lack of real communication about what the expectations are, and by general instability in my personal life. but it seems like they think I’m just lazy and entitled. I am beyond exhausted

    • strawbrei

      613d

      For some background: I just graduated college and started my first full time job a week later - before I got a chance to unpack, adjust back to being home, or process anything. I made it clear to my supervisors and manager right from the start that I am in the middle of a massive transition and I will need some time to get settled. so I did my training, it went great, they said I was picking things up very quickly and I think I made a good impression. then I started doing my work independently and things started falling apart. I’m making ~50-75% of the quota for the role I’m currently in (which is different from the role I was hired for, but I don’t know how much I can explain without exposing myself haha). I told my leadership that I need more support before I’ll be able to hit the mark, and I’m doing what I can but it’s taking time. I thought I got my message across but I was given a warning last week. something that my employers would not be allowed to do if they had given me the time to protect myself from retaliation.

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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