I understand the deep tailspin that depression and anxiety provides. Although everyone’s experience and how it affects them can be quite different. It’s so hard to pull yourself out of the hopeless spin and the suicidal thoughts that seems to follow. I have been managing that for a while now. I don’t know yet on which advice is allowed, but will share my experiences and what has worked best for me.
Being able to talk to a trusted professional is an amazing way to let your feelings out and try to understand what your mind/body are telling you behind the hopelessness. To me it can be a release to get out into the world and others what I’m feeling and trying to understand that most of it is a lie my mind is selling me and not fact. I always try to incorporate more mindfulness techniques- but sometimes that doesn’t stop the slide.
Secondly, I have been thru a lot of different medications to help manage the issues. Unfortunately everyone responds so different to all the medications available and some don’t respond at all. I have never responded well to medications for depression - most just don’t seem to help and the ones that did I had horribly side effects - a couple lowered my depression, but increased my anxiety. After running the gauntlet on oral medications - I stumbled onto Spravato and Ketamine Infusions. From my experience- these two treatments rapidly help decrease my suicidal thoughts and eased my depression - much faster than any pill. Spravato is a medication that you take via a nasal spray in a doctors office - Insurance will cover it, but you may have to meet certain requirements first. Ketamine infusions have saved my life - these are administers in a doctors office - but most insurance do not cover them and they can be pricey - however it is less hurdles to jump. Both of these are a treatment aren’t a permanent fix to most and require maintenance periodically for most people. I was able to ditch all oral depression medications after starting Ketamine infusions. There are two great Facebook groups on these two medications and are filled with extremely knowledgeable people.
I’m sorry my post was so long. There are so many options and it can be so overwhelming and so frustrating battling insurance and finding the right doctors who you trust.
I wish I had a quicker answer and better advice. It’s so tough when you fall into the hole and try to look up and see just darkness and hopelessness. Always happy to talk more of my experiences with my journey - reach out to someone if you can - anyone. I know how hard that is - it can seem like such a defeat or a burden. It’s not and you may find an ally to help you on your journey. I haven’t been the best with this piece of advice sometimes- but it’s very helpful having someone in your corner to help be with you during difficult times and meeting with doctors as the information is overwhelming.
J