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watt

638d

I've developed a severe fear of losing friends So for context, growing up I didn't have a lot of friends. I was always told I was an independent child who didn't need to be around others to be alright, and for the most part that was true. Even in school I had little to no friends. That was true until 7th grade when I moved to a school for academically gifted students. Here I've made more friends than I've ever imagined. However I've noticed that I'm becoming extremely afraid of losing said friends. It's not like its physical loneliness that's bothering me, I isolate myself all the time, but it's the idea of losing or disconnecting from a friend that's terrifying. I know it's normal to not want to lose friends, but my fear is bordering on the paranoia. I'm constantly thinking about my friends not actually liking me, hating me, et cetera. and when I'm with them in person, I'll be having a good time but then out of nowhere I have to run to the bathroom because I've convinced myself they hate me. and this is not the fault of my friends, they consistently reassure me in more ways than one, but even so this paranoia persists and its driving me insane

    • SourLemons

      638d

      hey... reading this, it felt like i was looking at something i would have written. everything from being independent, moving schools exacty at the same grade for the same reason, anxieties and fears of disconnecting with friends... it's so familiar to what i went through and to an extent still go through. just wanted to say that to tell you you aren't alone. i relate so much. i think your friends really care about you. every time you feel that paranoia creep up, take a look around at them and remember that in spite of your fear they do consistently come back to you, spend time with you, and reassure you. they're loyal as friends no matter the thoughts going on inside your head. that consistency tells me they want to still be your friend and that they'll continue to do so tomorrow, and the day after that. you deserve to have friends and deserve to be loved, and it sounds like your friends genuinely want to fulfill that social need for you. if you need someone to chat with feel free to come say hi. sending hugs ♡

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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