Dealing with Anxiety: My Journey So Far

Hi everyone. So I've been dealing with anxiety for about 5 years now. It started when I had a false alarm heart attack scare during a long depressive episode after not taking care of myself and eating unhealthy. Ever since, I've been hyperaware of my body, feeling like any small ache on my chest and left arm is a heart attack, any headache can be a stroke, anytime my breathe gets shallow, that I'd feel like im dying and surfacing anxiety attacks very often. It's exhausting. I've also been working on my feelings of anxiety when driving far distances. I've had about 4 panic attacks in the middle of the freeway, having to pull over. I've learned to de-escalate by grounding and deep breathing, but it only does so much. I take Xanax if needed, but I don't want to depend on it. I tried Zoloft but it made me feel like I couldn't focus and it scared me so I stopped. I'm currently taking cbd gummies with a bit of thc but it's expensive. It's been a debilitating journey, making me scared to go and have fun outside my home because of the fear of having an anxiety attack. I've been feeling more depressed because I'm just feeling hopeless about not being able to find the best way to decrease my feelings of anxiety. I also feel guilty because it's affecting my relationship with my partner because I hesitate to go out, being scared of having an anxiety attack. I just wanted to share my story and hope someone understands.