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ECSPets

781d

I have been dealing with my phobia for as long as I can remember I am 38 now and believe my fear first started when I was in my single digits, nothing seems to help other then when I start to feel sick taking a Zofran. I can't even say the words or read them without my mind going into overdrive and a thousand thoughts racing through my head. It's so bad that I can't live with my girlfriend of 8 years bc what if she gets sick our her 12 year old son does. I don't think she fully grasps the severity of my struggle but I know she tries. I have issues with washing hands and always keeping the toilet seat down by it triggers my phobia when I see it up, I'm not sure why but my girlfriend and son after 8 years can't seem to remember to shut the toilet lid when they are finished in the bathroom something they are well aware is a trigger for me. How do you all deal with the overwhelming, intense fear? I will seriously end my life before I allow myself to get sick.

Top reply
    • ECSPets

      755d

      @Illix Thank you so much for your feedback

    • Illix

      762d

      I used to take papaya tablets. 2 before and after every single meal and up to 4 during a panic moment. I know it's all in my head so I've been battling it with willpower mainly. Over the years I've been able to reduce my triggers. Most of them anyway. If it gets bad I've had a habit of twirling a part of my hair so hard that it hurts and it helps distract, or tetris on a Gameboy system, anything to require shifting my attention but not requiring much concentration. Tucking my thumb(s) into my fists and squeezing steadily helps as well. If going outside is an option I'll always take it and focus on the sky,clouds,trees,anything that shows the world around me is normal and it's me in my own world that's the problem and mentally remind myself I'm apart of the world and it's 1 moment in time that WILL pass. I've gone to therapists and taken meds and none of them can really help with phobias, so for over 2 decades I've just been trying to find ways to be able to handle it myself. Making sure my friends knew to just leave me alone and not ask if I was okay or draw any attention to my issues helped as well. Act normal, feel normal lol. Sometimes some stuff worked better than others but not always. Knowing that I do have methods that help me encourages me to push my triggers and that's how I've improved and cn handle more now but it's STILL an occasional issue. Also for me, if I end up puking, then I know it was for a real reason but I don't give up the fight until I can't control it, and usually after the first time, the anxiety parts of it decrease and I can start to feel a little better. I'm terrified of stomach bugs and flus because I could be sick for weeks vs. just a flare up from something not sitting right in my stomach. I almost never over eat anything and have to be in certain settings in certain moods when I try new foods. It's like I have to have time to mentally prepare myself for what I know could turn into a few hours of trial and torture and hell. Is this new food worth that? Lol. But I also try to be my own cheerleader too. I don't want fear to be a decision maker in my life if I can help it. Sorry for writing so much, maybe something in this novel might help you. Hope so.

      • ECSPets

        755d

        @Illix Thank you so much for your feedback

    • Afflewoom

      771d

      You know, the way I deal with it is a bit stupid. I just pretend I don’t have it. Everytime I get scared, I ignore the feeling and try my best to just not to do it! It sounds hard but it helps me out a lot. Basically larpinf as a person without emet!

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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