Dealing with a Bad Day: How to Stay Positive

I think one of my most detested pieces of "advice" is when someone says, "just look on the bright side!" Or "think positively!" Not only can that be really dismissive of your feelings and invalidating of your experience, especially with mental illness, but genuinely harmful. I'm not sure if that's advice you're trying to live out or something you are trying to reach on your own, but I would encourage you to maybe set a different goal. "Happy" isn't the default state of humans, in fact no emotion is our default. Emotions are like weather, something always has to be happening. Somedays are cloudy, some are sunny, some are blizzards that dump a couple feet of snow and you're stuck at home. Sure it's a good goal to work for more sunny days and fewer blizzards, but the weather always shifts and everyday can't be blue skys and sunshine. Nor should it be! As a human, it's okay to experience sadness, especially when things don't go your way. It's part of the human condition. I'm sorry you've had a rough couple days. That's never fun and always so frustrating. My advice is to allow yourself to feel those feelings. Accept that it's okay to be frustrated and sad when things don't work out. Try not to dwell on those feelings, but feel them as long as they demand to be felt. Then let go, look forward, and find joy in other things. Just like the weather, know that it will always change and eventually, it will be sunny again. Much easier said than done, I understand, but that is what I try to do and honestly, I only started really having problems with it when people tried to get me to "just be positive". Now I'm finding my way back 😊

Dont focus on being positive if all it makes you feel is negative then! maybe you need to focus on the negative and see why its affecting you and solve your negativities one by one, or at least acknowledge them rather than ignoring them or dismissing them. If its a person, kindly tell them you need space. If you forgot an item, keep a list next time. If its an item you need, go get it. Something like that. Hope this helps.

I know for me I definitely have difficulty staying positive 24/7 and frankly I think its very human of me to not be. Instinctually, humans tend to focus on the negative, not the positive. So something that's definitely helped me is being more self-compassionate and self-loving when I'm not feeling good or positive. I try to think to myself that it's normal to not always be thinking positively and that I have to allow myself to be human. I think I'm hearing from you that it's getting to a point where being positive is becoming unmanageable and out of your control. I want to ask if you are seeing a mental health professional like a therapist and/or a psychiatrist? Feel free to dm me if you'd like to talk more about this and if you feel comfortable sharing.

the way i deal with these types of days is to accept them as they come. i just always say to myself that if things aren’t working out or i don’t feel the best in the moment, i try to think less about those emotions being negative and more about them being a part of me ! you can’t help having quote on quote good days or bad days and YOU define what’s bad and what’s good so what i do is i just trick myself into thinking everything is the way it’s supposed to be and that the way i’m feeling right now is only a part of me i haven’t fully discovered or felt comfortable exploring yet. i’ve noticed that i’ve felt better after realizing this and have taken advantage of feeling this way by trying out different comfort techniques like showering or movies or food or whatever (try to use healthy coping mechanisms but obviously easier said than done just make sure you’re not depending too heavily on anything and rather using it as a crutch!) i’m not sure if this is helpful or not but i thought i’d throw in my two cents :) hope you’re doing alright and everything feels manageable!

Have a good cry in the shower with the lights off and music playing, it’s truly a release of stress