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LBDP779

468d

my wife's got Borderline Personality Disorder, PTSD, severe anxiety and she's either lethargic or extremely hyper. but the last few weeks she had really low mood and gets irritated very easily have any of you got any suggestions on how I cam cheer her up she doesn't even come out of the bedroom unless she let's the dogs out but she'll definitely not leave the house her anxiety stops her from going out. I just feel like she's putting this brick wall up due to her low mood where she's wanting space all the time. I just want to cheer her up or do something to try and get her out of her low mood

Top reply
    • Al_Phoenix

      468d

      I know after i got out of the psych hospital i was stuck inside all the time with horrible fear and depression. I'd try to stop getting her to go out and instead try to help her find some activities that you two can do together inside- a calm video game (not online at first), board game, or even just cuddle to a movie. Pay attention to those little tiny things- give her something in her favorite color, or from her favorite TV show...did she mention needing a new hairbrush? Surprise her with one. Those little things help so much and just build up from there

    • Helle

      467d

      Needs to talk to a doctor about it or even counseling (a lot of counsellors do zoom appointments)

    • 221bakerst

      468d

      find something to do with her inside the home or even in the comfort of her own bed. pay attention to the little things you know about her and bring them up as suggestions to do with her. if she likes video games ask if she wants to play. maybe read a book to her if she’d like that or even just set up a nice little hangout space in the bedroom like your teenagers all over again. just showing that you accept her in her lows by working around her needs of being inside and in her room will help a ton - i have bpd and ptsd myself.

      • 221bakerst

        468d

        @221bakerst remember she wouldn’t be doing what she is if she felt like she didn’t need to. we all don’t enjoy just being in bed and trapped all the time and just wanna be proven that we have a friend that’s willing to love us for who we are

        • 221bakerst

          468d

          @221bakerst and for what we need in those moments.

    • meggiedamoo

      468d

      As @Al_Phoenix suggested, stop trying to get her to go out. When I refuse to leave the house, it’s usually a lovely cocktail of confidence issues, self-loathing and hopelessness. Every so often, my flatmate and I will have a “Hoe Day” which sounds ridiculous at first, but essentially dolling yourself up as if you’re going out and then just staying in the flat. Maybe you and your wife could dress up all swanky and have a romantic evening inside? I’m thinking cook a romantic meal or get her favourite carry out but serve it with the table set very professionally. Don’t spring it on her, tell her you’re planning it and set aside a time. This will let her the chance to seek pleasure in making herself feel special and beautiful. A relaxing bath, legs shaved, hair and make up done etc. I’m a big tomboy but I still like to feel special. This can be in whatever way she usually flourishes. If she feels good about herself and has an event to look forward to inside, it may be a step forward for her current low moods and break up her routine a bit. This may be a long shot, but it can serve many purposes. It provides a setting to focus on both of you, that will both boost her within her own space and allow you the chance to spend quality time with your wife.

    • Al_Phoenix

      468d

      Showing her you're paying attention to even the little things she needs goes such a long way

    • Al_Phoenix

      468d

      I know after i got out of the psych hospital i was stuck inside all the time with horrible fear and depression. I'd try to stop getting her to go out and instead try to help her find some activities that you two can do together inside- a calm video game (not online at first), board game, or even just cuddle to a movie. Pay attention to those little tiny things- give her something in her favorite color, or from her favorite TV show...did she mention needing a new hairbrush? Surprise her with one. Those little things help so much and just build up from there

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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