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569d

Does anyone else feel like they can't ask for help, especially when you know your comfort person is also struggling?

Top reply
    • sabbz

      513d

      Yes I have a hard time because I am always helping others and my job is to help others but then when it comes to me it's hard to rely on others. It's hard being a caregiver type person and then trying to allow someone else to care for you because you're still thinking about that other person and what they're going through. I think of it like if you're a pillar holding everyone else up but over time things get heavy and your pillar gets cracks. Eventually, you'll need to let some things fall off and maybe allow someone to help you heal so you don't end up crumbling completely.

    • sabbz

      513d

      Yes I have a hard time because I am always helping others and my job is to help others but then when it comes to me it's hard to rely on others. It's hard being a caregiver type person and then trying to allow someone else to care for you because you're still thinking about that other person and what they're going through. I think of it like if you're a pillar holding everyone else up but over time things get heavy and your pillar gets cracks. Eventually, you'll need to let some things fall off and maybe allow someone to help you heal so you don't end up crumbling completely.

    • Space_Case92

      513d

      I constantly feel that way!

    • Barlam

      568d

      They say they are there for you but,can’t say anything cause they get upset, cause they can’t help, that’s what the tell me.mornings are really bad for me, so they go somewhere and come back when the know I probably feel better, if that makes sense..🤷‍♀️

      • Barlam

        513d

        @Barlam Makes a lot of sense, same here, I have the same Situation here..

    • Kellykristine52323

      569d

      Yes, but that is exactly the time you need to!! It will help you both. ! Tell this to your clinical. THIS is what they need to hear. Perhaps you body chemicals are unbalanced at the moment. Your body never stays situated and is always changing. It upto you to communicate it with a clinical so they may adjust meds to help you. The feeling your experiencing is awful, I have been there myself. You can force your other half to he pro active with their health.. but you can be an example. Journal, communicate with your clinician, and your loved ones, and stay busy..find little projects that you can do so you can feel accomplished at the end of the day.

    • TraumaWrecked

      569d

      Definitely. I always feel guilty venting to any friends, feeling like a burden and especially when I know they're barely keeping it together so I tend to keep everything bottled up which isn't good either

    • FeelsBadMan

      569d

      please do. even if you feel as if you wont be taken seriously or validated on the issue, you don't know who actually cares so its not always a terrible thing to do yknow

    • Fire101

      569d

      On a daily basis. My husband is disabled so i dont allow myself to show when I need help because i dont want him to either hurt himself helping me OR I dont want him to feel bad because he cant.

    • unicorn

      569d

      I feel you. ❤️ for me, it often happens because I know my mom/other people in my life are not good at setting boundaries, so I feel like I have to set them for them by sharing the bare minimum or not sharing at all

      • TooindecisiveTopick

        569d

        @unicorn THIS it’s exhausting to tip toe around and read the minds of people who don’t understand how to communicate what they are and aren’t okay with

    • katie19

      569d

      I totally get that. My best friend always tells me she’s hear to talk when I start to open up about my anxiety but I don’t want to burden her and I don’t like to talk about my feelings. Even though it can be hard, if someone is a real friend they’ll help you when you ask no matter what.

    • PlaslyMeds

      569d

      I hate those moments, and I definitely have them often. But if you have a healthy relationship with that person, most times they welcome the distraction. They want to help you. And you can also offer to help them as well, or just be a shoulder to cry on

    • BevBug

      569d

      Dude, yes! I feel like a burden when I need help, especially when I trick myself into thinking I could do it on my own. Even if the thing is out of my control because of course I convince myself it's my fault! You are not alone. And it's super difficult to unlearn that. We're all rooting for you though!

    • enbypup

      569d

      yes. it's so hard when you feel like you can't ask for help. i always feel like i'm annoying people when i ask for help too. i know it's important to ask for help but it can be so hard

    • SundaySmall

      569d

      Absolutely. It’s even trickier if we understand that sometimes our feelings of bringing someone down are distortions but other times it’s true that it isn’t fair to expect one person to take on everything for us. This is part of the reason it’s so important to have as broad of a support circle as you can, including a therapist.

    • QueenK

      569d

      All the time, or people will claim they’re there for me and then don’t make time lol

      • enbypup

        569d

        @QueenK i totally feel this! part of me understands that they don't owe me their time and things can come up. but another part of me feels so abandoned when they don't actually help... :(

        • QueenK

          563d

          @enbypup I understand how you feel, I’m here if you ever want to talk

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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