It became toxic and bad at first. But after coping I’ve been able to handle to it pretty well with the point of ppl not even being able to tell. And so the first step is being able to recognize your bpd behaviors. Next you gotta recognize when you’re doing these behaviors. Once your able to do that and you see that your having an episode or such you can remind yourself “this is an episode. I need to calm down. I dont even want to react this way” and sometimes even reminding yourself that typa stuff won’t stop you from doing things so if you can recognize it you can also let your partner know what’s happening even if it’s as it’s happening so they can be aware and understanding of it too. It takes time and practice but like if I notice I’m manic I say it outloud instantly. Whether I’m alone, with friends, my partner. No matter what if you see that you’re in an episode or are manic or you’re doing these behaviors. Say it outloud and let yourself know. Just being able to hear it can help you take a step back

I split on my long time boyfriend regularly. I can't believe he has stayed with me for 7 years. I would have left me.