Struggling with Rapid Cycling and Insecurity

Feeling like my mood stabilizer may have stopped working. I was doing good and then followed my same pattern once again of starting manic at a job and then quitting once my moods went low again. Since then, I’ve been in a weird headspace. Rapid cycling. The last week or so, I’ve been feeling SUPER insecure. Bringing up past BS in my marriage. Feeling like I look like a “crazy” person with bipolar. Yelling at my husband for taking another woman out 6 years ago. And then being apologetic, loving, forgiving. And then overthinking and eventually snapping again. Really irritable. I don’t know what’s going on and I can’t wait to see my psychiatrist and therapist to figure this out. Ugh.