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IReallyLoveTMA

664d

I've been officially diagnosed with Autism for a long time now, and I was wondering if it interfered with feelings of sexual attraction/romantic attraction for anyone else. I have always had trouble with this, and it's especially prominent now that I'm older and everyone I know is romantically involved with someone else. I've always wanted something like romantic like that, but never carried out typical romantic ideals or actions with the people I've dated, which was definitely one of the reasons they stopped dating me. Was my unwillingness just a lack of understanding of sociatal themes, and a feeling of uncomfortableness around changing what I deemed to be the social norm, or is there something more surrounding that?

Top reply
    • IReallyLoveTMA

      662d

      @mearbearz thank you for the thoughtful reply, i genuinely appreciate it :) I've been trying to keep that in mind, and recently it's gotten hard, so you telling me that, especially at a time when I need it, really made me feel better and more capable. thank you again :)

    • Lyndon

      662d

      I can definitely relate to that my home life I have struggled with getting into a romantic relationship or even just socializing in general due to my high functioning autism i’ve been diagnosed since I was 12 when I was in elementary school I used to have crushes and even in middle school too it wasn’t until I was in high school that I stopped having crushes but I still never was able to find a boyfriend and I’ve never considered myself gay so finding a girlfriend was definitely out of the question it wasn’t until a few years ago when I really found out what I believe my sexual orientation is and that is asexual/straight because I’ve never really had an interest in sex or any of the typical romantic relationship type things I mean I have an interest in getting a romantic relationship but having sex kissing hugging I’ve never really been into the idea of any of that but everything else in a romantic relationship I want I want to have a boyfriend one day I want to have a husband one day I want to have a family one day but part of the thing that is keeping me from that is socialization is hard for me with new people so making friends or even finding a boyfriend is kind a hard for me and now that I’m done with college it’s even harder because there’s nothing to really put me in the same room with people and give me the chance to make friends now I have to find friends out in the world and that’s even harder

      • Lyndon

        662d

        @Lyndon When it said my home Life I meant my whole life I was voice typing and it won’t let me correct my comment

    • AnimalBoy

      662d

      Autistic people are a bit more likely to have differences in their sexuality and romantic orientation, in either direction really. We're more likely to be on the asexual and/or Aromantic spectrums as well as being more likely to be interested in kinks and polyamory, sometimes even all at once. Im actually hypersexual, I think from trauma but who knows, but also Aromantic and polyamorous. It's all just wiring in the brain, and you are definitely not alone nor are you inherently limited to specific relationship types because of it.

    • EMT_MiguelRamirez

      662d

      I find myself in a similar situation bro. I understand you

      • IReallyLoveTMA

        662d

        @EMT_MiguelRamirez Thank you for taking the time to reply in such a validating way!! (and I mean that sincerely and genuinely!) I'm sorry you have to deal with it though, as I know it's really not a good place to be, so I hope it gets better for you, and you come to understand more about your identity and your relationship to intimacy and relationships.

    • mearbearz

      664d

      Well everyone’s relationship with their autism is unique and how it affects you in social life will therefore be unique. But generally speaking, we tend to struggle with relationships. Both romance and friendships. I think it might be because people kinda see us as weird and they don’t see that as attractive. It does get better though with age as people become less judgmental. Again it can really vary from person to person so that doesn’t mean it necessarily applies to you. All that I will say though is Id advise you against being apologetic about who you are or trying to change because you feel people expect you to. That’s a very dark path to go down because ultimately, you can’t change who you are. And that’ll eat away at your self esteem. People will see that too and they won’t find that exactly endearing. Always room for self improvement and smoothing out the rough edges of course, but I think it’s important to accept that you are different from others. It may take a while before you find someone but stay firm to who you are, you won’t regret it at the end of the day. That’s anyways the wisdom Ive gotten from living 20 years as an autistic person. Hope it helps you :))

      • IReallyLoveTMA

        662d

        @mearbearz thank you for the thoughtful reply, i genuinely appreciate it :) I've been trying to keep that in mind, and recently it's gotten hard, so you telling me that, especially at a time when I need it, really made me feel better and more capable. thank you again :)

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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