Struggling with Anxiety and Xanax Addiction

hello I'm new to this app and I need someone to talk to about my really bad anxiety and my panic attacks.... iv been taking xanax (not prescribed) and it has helped me. but now I feel like I am stuck in a spiral... I take for my everyday activities and if I don't have it I get Terrible withdrawals i.e seizures, lost or reality, extreme panic attacks, impending of doom..... I also have health anxiety whenever I feel a pain I'm not familiar with I get paranoid and think I am going to die especially in my chest I feel like I'm going to have a heart attack that's my worse feel... my stress has gotten to the point that I can't sleep, or eat, my stress has also been giving me sleep paralysis.. everytime I try to sleep my mind is just racing non stop I want to tell it to shut up, but it's hard. xanax has helped me but whenever I don't have it or when I'm low I start freaking out HELP please