As to not freaking out when someone comes near you, I always try to put myself in their shoes. It feels like an odd concept, but people WANT to go out and talk to other people. To chat with strangers, just like how you want to do your own hobbies. Trust your spidey senses though- if someone makes you uncomfortable and just has a vibe that’s off, trust that. It’s easy to freak out about that but being in a place where there are people working is a start. As for answering questions, I started off answering others by asking myself the same question. How would you respond to yourself? “What’s your favorite type of cake?” Answer yourself in your head, then speak it out loud. Don’t be afraid to express when you’re happy or disgusted or when you think something is cute. That’s how people communicate and how people get to know you (it’s a scary thought I know). As for medicine and therapy- I went through 5 therapists before I found a really good one. Finding therapist that specialize in anxiety, and then asking them questions about how they approach it, what they like about it, if they have personal experience, etc. is important too. Your therapist may be able to either prescribe or suggest medicines for your anxiety, or your doctor will be able to. Remember it’s okay to change doctors if you feel that you aren’t being listened to and heard. It’s scary, but I can tell you right now the doctors don’t mind at all (especially therapists!) if they do, it’s really their own problem at that point (and no you didn’t cause that problem for them).
Finally journaling- I’ve heard it’s a great coping mechanism! I’ve tried it but I have ADD so I can’t stick with it but writing things I’m anxious about down can really help take the mental load off. Some of the best things I’ve heard from my therapist for social anxiety is: put yourself in someone else’s shoes when you’re going over everything you said to someone that day. What would you think if someone had said that to you? How much would you think about it? How many “what if’s” can you really control?
Remember it takes time and for me it took learning to forgive myself. Do I have cringy things I think about I’m still embarrassed about? Heck yeah. But is it okay I’ve had cringy moments? Of course. I’m only human.
It takes a lot of healing to be able to do things you see other people doing so easily. It takes trust that others see you as human too.
My suggestion (no I don’t mind in the slightest if you don’t take it because I won’t know, and I only want you to thrive) is to find a group of friendly nerds. I may be a little biased because I’m a nerd myself. Nerdy girls, gays and they’s are generally some of the LEAST judgmental groups I’ve ever met, and I’ve met so many people. They often know what it’s like to be anxious socially, or in general.
I’m wishing you the best 🤗