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The Impact of Abstinence on Mental Health

dimemanda

701d

not having sex for 3 years, plays a big part on my anxiety and depression

2

4

4

Depression

Anxiety (Including GAD)

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Top reply
    • Beithne

      700d

      @dimemanda I think it is different for different situations. I sat him down and explained that the lack of sex was damaging my mental health. I had no plans to find someone else to love, but I needed to find an outlet for my sexual needs. It took some time for him to be able to accept it. I was as compassionate as I could be, but I wasn't exaggerating the toll on my mental health. He witnessed my descent into self destructiveness. My depression got so bad I almost left. I never used leaving as a threat and I gave no ultimatums. I just tried to be as open and honest about the situation as I could.

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    • Beithne

      701d

      I went 11 years without. My husband had a severe vitamin deficiency and completely lost his libido. Then never seemed to want to get it back. I almost left him. Sex isn't the most important part of a relationship but the complete absence of it without that being a prior understanding can be crushing. We finally came to an agreement that I can find my own solution (friends with benefits). I am with him for love, not sex, and I can find sex anywhere. I would much prefer for him to be fully functional, but at least I have him for everything else.

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      • dimemanda

        701d

        @Beithne how do I bring up the topic of friends with benefits

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        • Beithne

          700d

          @dimemanda I think it is different for different situations. I sat him down and explained that the lack of sex was damaging my mental health. I had no plans to find someone else to love, but I needed to find an outlet for my sexual needs. It took some time for him to be able to accept it. I was as compassionate as I could be, but I wasn't exaggerating the toll on my mental health. He witnessed my descent into self destructiveness. My depression got so bad I almost left. I never used leaving as a threat and I gave no ultimatums. I just tried to be as open and honest about the situation as I could.

          1

          Reply
    • varjokorppi

      701d

      I went through this with my partner as well. I almost left her multiple times because of it. Sex isn't the most important thing in a relationship, but a complete lack of it can make a person feel unloved. We eventually went to couples counseling and have been having sex regularly for the past 7 months, but the road to get there was difficult. I am guessing that there may be other deeper problems in your relationship. Counseling may be helpful.

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☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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