The Deep Longing of a Daughter for Her Mother's Love

Every once in a while i will have a taste or smell that reminds me of something the most recent one was when I was drinking strawberry milk and remembered walking to the front porch in my aurora night gown and seeing my mom, beauty incarnate on the porch with a cigarette and a full wine glass and I will feel the lump in my throat and the deep longing in my chest as she screamed at me to go inside loud enough to wake the whole neighborhood and how I would go and lay in her bed because I knew she wouldn’t be in for hours but I still layer there longing for even a hint of her scent and the feel of her hair. How I would lay crying and begging to a god that never answered me to explain why she didn’t have time to love me. Her first born daughter that she put so much effort into getting. Why I’m not worth laying down with until I fall asleep. Anyway how was your day?