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Squishlover

536d

ok so what would you guys do? I have something that has been pulling at me for years. I dated someone back in 2011 and something happened where I got in trouble and it kinda ruined his life also. I've been having nightmares about not ever being able to talk to him about it. during this time he reached out to me but I didn't think it was a good idea for us to talk yet. now I feel I need to buy I have no idea where he lives now and his number is different. is it weird to do a people search and send him a letter? like it's giving me so much anxiety.

    • Heaven197987

      536d

      You could try to find him on Facebook if you use and send a message to him that way

      • Squishlover

        536d

        @Heaven197987 he doesn't have any social media

        • Heaven197987

          536d

          @Squishlover well I would write him a letter explaining what happened if you're wanting open communication options give him away to contact you

    • Dad.of.Many

      536d

      I would write exactly what your heart tells you and then put the letter away in case you ever find him again, or for total release, take it out to the back yard and burn it page by page, letting the night breeze carry away the ashes.

    • keropel

      536d

      If you send a letter, just explain everything and complete this thought in your mind. Worst case scenario, he may not reply but he will understand better. Either way, I think it's good to do what is on your mind so you can move forward. Whether he replies or not or thinks badly of you is in his hands at that point. Try not to stress about it too much. All you can do is do what you feel is best and keep moving forward. I would just make sure to mention in the letter that he only needs to reply if he wants to and that it is your last message to him if you don't receive a reply. Also, give a more convenient way to reply if he wishes to do so. Its only my opinion. Trust your gut feeling. Only you know all of the details

      • Squishlover

        536d

        @keropel the thing is I have to do like a people search to get his address because he moved. it's kind of stalkerish but I mean I'm not gonna act crazy or anything. I never got to say goodbye to him. when he contacted me I wasn't ready to talk to him. it's been 7 years but it's destroying me inside

        • keropel

          536d

          @Squishlover the way I see it is, if he sees you as a stalker, you still resolved your feelings of wanting to explain the situation and everything else stays the same of no communication. Or he sees it as endearing and will contact uou to further complete communication. Either way, i beleive things will improve for you by sending the letter and getting it off your mind as an option. It's not like he can go to the cops because of one letter seen as being like a stalker. (Unless you put threats in there or something creepy) lol So unless you have friends in common, there isn't much that will effect you by what he thinks

    • health1

      536d

      Closure is always good. Write a letter even if its only for you and you dont send it at least you will ve able to express your feelings and hopefully let it go

    • Faithe

      536d

      Write a letter and don't send it.

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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