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Starlightie

702d

Just had a panic attack over having to call out of work for my mental health. I always feel guilty when it's a mental health issue and I'm not actually sick. Our society puts so much pressure on us to be productive citizens and the stigma around mental health makes it so hard to take those much needed self care days. I was ready to force myself to go if my manager hadn't told me to just stay home. I didn't even ask to stay home, I just told her that I'm not all there today and I can do smaller menial tasks to at least help in some way. She said not to worry about it and get some rest but I still feel heavy with guilt. Why is it that I literally can't stand up right now without falling over but I feel like I'm a failure and I'm just not trying hard enough? I feel like I could just suck it up and deal with it. Like it's bad, but it's not THAT bad for me to be inconveniencing everyone else at work by staying home. I'm severely depersonalizing right now to the point where I can't move my body, but I MUST be over exaggerating. I'm faking it. I'm lying to get out of work.

    • doodle123

      597d

      You do what’s best for you! Jobs don’t give a shit about you. That’s why you gotta do what you gotta do for your own health!!

    • IndyMonkee13647

      670d

      I have a lot of Depersonalization and Derealization episodes and I get having to compromise with yourself and dealing with the guilt of other people picking up your slack even when you are at work. You are absolutely valid in your experience and you are very strong for dealing with it day to day. This is a very real struggle and it’s hard. It is bad somedays, and there is no way to sugarcoat that. It’s okay to take time for you because you matter. You shouldn’t put yourself over a job. Your mental health matters more than forcing yourself in when you are having a severe episode of dissociation. I will say, you are lucky to have employers that understand because most don’t care about mental health like you were saying and that’s a shame. It sounds like your boss cares about your mental well being and really understands you are having a rough time. They want you to take the time you need to heal and grow and better yourself, because sometimes you need to take time alone to do that instead of working a job and working on yourself somedays. You aren’t faking or lying about your experiences to get out of work, if you were, you definitely wouldn’t be reacting this way and hurt by your dissociation. I hope this helps and you can heal from all of this. It’s a very difficult thing to go through and you are very strong for handling it at all.

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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