Losing My Emotional Support Animal and Psychiatrist

Today my mental health problems have just destroyed me. I recently lost my emotional support animal but she was more than that to me, she was my daughter. I had her for 11 years and she passed Dec 11. She helped me stay alive literally she kept me from committing suicide. No one has ever loved me as much as Marry did. So I’ve lost that support and today I lost my psychiatrist due to my insurance. My psychiatrist has been the first and only person I have told the truth about my mental health problems. I was raised to be ashamed and to keep mental illness a secret so it doesn’t hurt the family. Losing those life lines are apocalyptic to me. So I’ve lost all of my ways to cope and I just cried all day knowing I have to restart that trust and find a way to live without Marry. I’ve scheduled and appointment to get a new psychiatrist but I’m scared. I’m alone in this world now that Marrys gone and I don’t have my psychiatrist anymore. I just needed to get it out because I have no one left I can talk too.