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Tiyanna

682d

help please I really need someone to talk to at the moment who can sympathize with me...My husband only gets mad when I get upset and it makes me more upset so pls pls someone dm me so I can call and talk

    • ghost_light

      681d

      I'm here if you need it

      • Tiyanna

        681d

        @ghost_light okay thanks

    • ghost_light

      681d

      Its sometimes difficult for someone who doesn't experience what we go through to get upset

    • pastelfreckle

      681d

      my ex used to get mad when I would get upset because he didnt know how to help and it frustrated him. I would get worse and try to explain he was making it so much worse but his guilt just turned into anger instead of compassion most of the time. its from a place of helplessness maybe, but it doesn't make it okay. that was something that took me forever to realize. just because there is a reason for their actions doesn't make the way their making you feel okay. if I'm wrong and it's a different situation and he just gets mad that you're upset, that is absolutely messed up. you deserve an emotional support system, not a bully.

      • Tiyanna

        681d

        @pastelfreckle I'm not exactly sure why he gets so mad....All I know is he would tell me that my anxiety/depression is all in my head and he acts the way he does so I can tuffen up and fight through it 🤷🏽‍♀️...But yes I've explained to him before that his reaction only makes me more upset especially because he's my husband and who I would like to be there the most to comfort me 😥 Honestly I'm kinda feeling that he doesn't know exactly how to comfort me(even though I've told him) but my husband's had a ruff childhood his dad was never in his life and his mom was an alcoholic who abandoned him and left him with his Granny, he's had an uncle of his to force him to hold a gun a shoot a man, he's walked 30 miles alone as a teenager from Augusta Georgia to our hometown of Millen...he's just been through alot of trauma and has only seen a therapist once for all of it and they wanted him to come back but he refused to go. Tbh I feel like he needs some type of therapy as well.

        • pastelfreckle

          681d

          @Tiyanna okay it sounds like he has come from a background where emotional support was not taught to him. quite the opposite. and even more over, I think people who have suffered like that tend to deny their own mental health, because they never have and want/know where to start with it. that leads to denial of other peoples mental health as well, and all he knows how to do is 'tough love' which is really a byproduct of the abuse he suffered. he might think he has no mental health issues because he was brought up with 'tough love' so he thinks that's how he'll help/fix you. therapy would definitely be beneficial for him, and you too! he isnt a support system for you right now because he doesn't know how, but you still need one. are you seeing anyone??

    • xpixelbee

      681d

      Some people aren't equipped to handle mental illness. They could also be struggling themselves with something unknown. Him getting upset when you're upset is a reaction. Was it caused by him, or is it due to your mental illness? Maybe even just a bad day? If it's caused by him then maybe better communication could help. Walking away and coming back when you're more calm and can talk about it. Or, some things are worth letting go. It's not worth the emotional pain and anxiety

      • Tiyanna

        681d

        @xpixelbee tbh I've been holding in alot because my husband's not the easiest person 2 open up to about my feelings. I'm going through my daughter being curious about boys and acting out some in school (my husband had been nagging me mostly every other day for weeks now bout her going 2 live with her dad's parents for a year but im having a hard time trying to get them to do it) intop of that I've been dealing with being in the house weeks with all 4 of my kids and no breaks. And my husband don't seem to understand

    • Thresh

      681d

      hey im always down to talk if u need. we can be transparent and understanding

      • Tiyanna

        681d

        @Thresh okay thank you very much

    • Weezy

      682d

      I know how it is my gf recently broke up with me bc of all the things going on but if you need to talk hmu I wouldn't mind

      • Tiyanna

        681d

        @Weezy aww I'm sorry and okay thank you 👍

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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