dearestdoe

94d

my last couple of months have been all sorts of chaotic. i decided (admittedly on a whim) to move two states away to a town where i dont know anyone, went through a hell of a process with the apartment complex i moved into, had to find a new job (in a field i have little experience in, in a town an hour away from my apartment) since i couldnt transfer, blew a tire one hour into the move (with three screaming cats in the car, no less), had to deal with invasive family for three days, lost my insurance when i moved and am struggling to get new coverage, my car's oil life on 0 for three weeks, and have had to repeatedly ask my mom for financial help (after two years of living completely independently) because i couldnt even afford enough gas to get to and from work some days. all this on top of chronic pain issues, new symptoms of what im hoping isnt lupus, three cats constantly trying to attack each other, running out of one of my meds, getting sick not once but twice, and increasing memory issues.

i havent spoken to any of the others, but the lapses in my memory let me know that theyve been in and out. communication is still very poor in all areas but theyre at least trying (i think lol), which is all i can ask for.

making connections has been super rough going so far, since i knew absolutely nobody in the whole state, but i get along well with my coworkers and have been communicating with a local reform temple about membership! so theres that to look forward to. my job had no problems working with my schedule so i can attend services, and the rabbi has been super sweet (bonus: there are a lot of queer folk there as well; the rabbi is actually gay and i think nonbinary! so i wont feel so alone or judged)

my anxiety has been super bad but im coping surprisingly well, no relapses or anything, only one panic attack (and to be fair it was due to a couple in our store screaming and threatening us and other customers, so not exactly uncalled for). ive been really struggling with socializing, i feel sooooo burnt out, and i hope my friends know that i still care for them even though im hardly messaging anyone.

all in all i think im doing...... okay, all things considered. it was really rough for a while and its still hard, but im managing. ive got support and people who love me, and thats all i can really ask for (besides maybe insurance so i can see a doctor lol)

Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID)

Dissociation

Memory Loss

Anxiety (Including GAD)

View all

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

Thank you! Your submission has been received!
Oops! Something went wrong while submitting the form.