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569d
has anyone here been married to a narcissist & managed to divorce them?
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Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)
Chronic Generalized pain
Anxiety (Including GAD)
Depression
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548d
To me, narcs are evil and don't deserve anybody but their family. As a child of divorced parents which one of them is a narc, 0/10 do not recommend. Not worth the mess and the child's mental and emotional well being. I'm going to be extra picky about who I choose to be the father of my children so that way they don't have to heal from their childhood like I had to.
1
I have a friend who recently got out! š it is possible!
549d
Yup the second he turned on me and showed his true colors is when I initiated divorce. Which was a few months into our marriage.
@Chexpie I wish I did that would of saved me on so much pain
@Heaven197987 š„ are things any better now?
0
550d
I was married to a narcissist and they made me feel so shitty all the time. But it is possible. My best friend ended up ending her marriage with someone who was a severe narcissist and that ended like 2 years ago, and they are finally legally divorced.
2
Some of you need to leave this poor woman alone, (you know who I'm talking to) she's been through enough. This is HER post. Unless you have something nice to say, don't say anything.
Thankfully no. But my mother has with my father. I'd like to talk to you privately If that's okay?
I wish you luck, I stayed with my ex after he cheated on me, spent hundreds on my credit card and lied about it. (I found the receipts in his car) it's not easy, but it's been done. I believe in you :)
551d
Yeah currently still fighting for my divorce
@BritBrat92 stay strong! ā¤ļø
Not legally married, but dated for 3 years and lived together the whole time. The only way I got out was when he cheated and left me for the girl. I even wanted to stay after he cheated - thatās how manipulated I was! The fact that you are looking to leave is a good sign that youāve broken though the manipulation and gaslighting at least somewhat. I donāt know what steps you take to leave a narcissist, but I do know what itās like to be with one and be absolutely miserable. I wish you all of the best luck in your divorce.
3
@katitomato I was the same way. They cheated on me twice. Treated me awfully. It took until they left me for it to finally stick. It's awfully how good they are at manipulating.š„
554d
Hey Iām not saying people with NPD canāt be abusive / toxic but so can anyone. Narcissists are people with a disability that suffer for it just like you and everyone else on this app, so letās be a little more intentional with our language. Thanks.
552d
@t4t You're absolutely right that anyone can be abusive or toxic. But it is part of the diagnostic criteria for NPD and ASPD, which has kind of been proven by the only person in this conversation with NPD- AriJuda. Abuse from a narcissist is very different from other abuse. They act and manipulate different. This creates a unique experience for their victims/survivors. Which is what this question was supposed to be for.
@Neuco you are amazing. That is all.
555d
Yea. Unfortunately it is all about them. Go back to who you were and what you loved without them. Donāt contact. Itās a sad and long and painful time. Itās hard to when they find someone else quicker. Itās only because they need to fulfill theyāre needs. You are worth someone who will love you
@Maybe5 Iām really happy youāre starting this better life for yourself and hope you find the beauty in your own content and compassion
@Maybe5 thank you so much for your kind & encouraging words. He went silent as soon as the divorce was finalized even though he owes me money (court ordered of course) and he has my dog.. I have a feeling I'll never hear from him or see my pup again. š„²
556d
Not married to one but was engaged to one. I still struggle every day with a lot of the damage they left in their wake. He tried to trap me by getting me pregnant and it backfired in his face horribly. When he realized he was losing me he started in with the abuse. He was horrible and manipulative and pathetic. Iām so sorry youāre going through this.
OMG HOW CREEPY!!! Iām literally excusing my Narc from my life as we speak!!!! BEGONE TRIGGER!!! Hellooooooo freeeedommmmmm šŖš¼šš¤š¼
4
I lived with a narcissist, which was my dad. I practically ran away to live with my boyfriend to get away from my father. He was always making himself look like the good guy in the situation when he was fighting with my boyfriend's family and was trying to convince me my boyfriend was a terrible person and a stalker. This was all so daddy could keep his little girl cooped up and never leave him ever. I figured out he was lying when my boyfriend's family showed the whole story and even a voice recording of my dad threatening them. That was the night I decided to not return home.
@Creator oh my. I'm so so sorry your dad turned out to be that kind of person. You don't deserve that at all! I hope you are doing well since you left ā¤ļø
@brabbit I'm doing alot better mentally now. Physically though, it has went down hill since I was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease a few months after I left and just it's been difficult managing it since I'm so new. I'm so use to NOT being sick, I was the healthiest child, was only sick like maybe 2 days a year. Rarely ever got sick, now it's just UGH. Lol. But yes, in general, I'm so glad I'm out. I'm happily with my loving and supportive boyfriend who cares for me and is concerned of my wellbeing.
563d
My ex husband was extremely manipulative and emotionally abusive. We were married for 15 years. 7 were pretty good. But then he started lying about everything. He gaslight me so badly. It was pretty bad.
@mydragonmoon I'm so glad you were able to get out! ā¤ļø I'm kinda surprised it took 7 years for the mask to come off.
I was and so glad I divorced him when I did
I am starting to think I am married to one. Iām kinda scared to dig into it š„
@Gianna321 this sounds so silly but I first suspected after finding myself on the narcissist side of tik tok. Good luck to you & feel free to message me if you have any questions ā„ļø
Iām starting to suspect that Iām married to a narcissist, since all these algorithms seem to want to send me stuff about being in a relationship with one, but I struggle to think these things she does that match with that stuff, sheās consciously choosing to. I donāt want to divorce her, I just want to find out what caused the sudden change that made her line up with one in the last couple of years. Weāve been together for 19 years but the last 3 sheās been doing a lot of these narcissistic traits. Iām not going to judge anyone whose in a different situation and wants out though, so I would say if you want to leave them, just do it and donāt talk to them about it if youāre afraid theyāll try to manipulate you from leaving, while their gone at work just take your stuff and leave then let someone else serve the divorce papers after youāve changed your number and scrubbed your socials
566d
Yes! Itās insanely difficult and he still causes issue as we share a kid together. Feel free to message if you want to talk about whatās going on with you!
564d
@Cece7 thank you so much ā¤ļø I've distanced from mine as much as I can but he still expects me to pay for his life like he's entitled to it. Setting boundaries has been something I've been working on for a while now but it's still difficult.
567d
I was engaged to one for about a year and a half. Was absolutely brutal
568d
my mom was, but hes divorcing her for another women but yet he refuses to sign the papers right now, i have a good understanding of the divorce if you have any questions
@Ink789 thank you for offering your help ā¤ļø this isn't my first divorce unfortunately. Just trying to connect with people who have been emotionally abused by a narcissist
@brabbit i understand. i have been, he wasnt abusive to my mom but he was heavily to me and my sister. i can only relate to him being a narcissist and abusive but not the marriage part. i hope you get through it though! you deserve kindnessā¤ļø
bruh npd is a mental illness too, don't throw us under the bus
545d
@AriEden did just want to point out here that while most narcissists are abusive, it is NOT a criteria of narcissism to be abusive according to the DSM 5. That doesnāt dismiss the fact that many people are abused by narcissists, including the OP, and it is a common behavior among narcissists, but it is possible to be a narcissist without being abusive.
@katitomato did you think this was a good response
@AriEden it is, you are correct. However, the abuse is the issue, not the diagnosis. A diagnosis is simply a stepping stone that many NPD cannot take because of the hallmarks of the issue. So. It's not an inaccurate question.
558d
@AriEden this is supposed to be an app with no drama. Mental illness or not... Ableist or not... Don't say stuff like that on someone's feed just because you take offense. This is supposed to be a place to safely express ourselves and comments like that make people leave which could be a bad thing if they are suicidal ijs. The way I see it, ur never gna meet the person you are calling an "ableist" so ignore it. Can't take offense to a stranger. We are allowed to vent here but drama free. Nothing good could every come from a comment like the one you said. Everyone knows name calling is starting crap.
@TheFemaleSmokey no, you actually have no right to be ableist. ever. not even in your safe space, that y'know, isn't safe for other mentally ill people.
@AriEden in true narcissist fashion you took this post that has nothing to do with you and made it about you
@GeneralBonkers the post about narcs isn't about me, a narc. okay. pretty sure that's gaslighting, but you could never do that, you don't have evil disease (npd) /s
@GeneralBonkers you ppl constantly insinuate that random bad ppl have my disorder do you not see how hilarious this response is
@AriEden asking if someone has been able to divorce their abusive partner isn't throwing you under the bus but if the shoe fits wear it
5
@AriEden nobody is throwing anybody under the bus. I personally have been emotionally abused by someone with NPD and have PTSD from it & I'm trying to connect with people who have been through something similar.
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@AriEden NPD and ASPD are very different from BPD.
@Neuco no, you're just ableist honey, work on that
3x
I'm currently going through the process. My state has a waiting period to file for divorce, but I'm currently separated and have been since February.
ā This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision
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