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Ena_Silvoc

645d

How do people not feel so guilty about choosing their mental health over their best friend when their best friend is also going through their own personal struggles? I feel like my friend is going through so much more than me but I'm so depressed I'm struggling with finding reasons to keep going. I feel like our friendship is on it's last legs because I couldn't be there in the way I was needed.

Top reply
    • datum

      645d

      YOU are your most important person. We travel through life with one constant only, and that is the self. It’s so hard to set those boundaries especially with best friends. But remember that they would do the same.

    • katc

      644d

      Sometimes you have to do for you first or you can't help anyone else.

    • EatenByWormy

      644d

      Be honest with them. It’s hard to carry depression with you day to day, and maintaining friendships is very difficult right now. It’s not because of how you feel about them, it’s how you feel about your own life that you’re working on. Someone who loves you will want you to do the right thing for yourself, too.

    • Mop

      644d

      I cant promise that they'll respond well, but it's important anyways, and if they choose to take it negatively despite your explanation that's on them. Hard, but not your fault. If they're a true friend they'll at least come to recognize that and forgive you in time.

    • LunarRose

      644d

      I guess it's up to you how you choose to deal with your mental health. For me, I feel better when I help others first. Service has always made me happy. I can calm down enough to help others, then when I come back to work on me, I am in a much less stressful set of mind and I have an easier time working on me. Of course everyone is different, and if you need to work on you first, never let anyone dim your light for doing what is in your heart.

    • Mop

      645d

      My two best friends and I both fell to our lowest points at the same exact time, for unrelated reasons. They were able to handle each other's problems, but mine were too overwhelming, so I went through it alone, but I understood, because I knew how they were feeling. Once we all recovered we were able to get back together and everything is fine now. Relationships where both members are mentally unstable can be harmful, due to neither's fault. That's what we discovered at first. It was far better to step back. Sometimes being with someone through the thick and thin means recognizing you dont have the strength to carry them right now.

      • Ena_Silvoc

        644d

        @Mop I just really hope my friend will realize I'm not trying to be a bad friend. I'm just trying to stand up for my own needs right now.

    • datum

      645d

      YOU are your most important person. We travel through life with one constant only, and that is the self. It’s so hard to set those boundaries especially with best friends. But remember that they would do the same.

    • lachelle

      645d

      Sometimes you have to put you first and your real friends will be there in the end. I've been threw three friendships and neither of them are my fiends now because I put myself first. One friend I had before them though she's still my friend now and understands my condition you just have to find that friend my inbox is open as well 🤗❤️

    • Zin

      645d

      No it's not wrong at all. Putting yourself first is never wrong. If your friend was truly your friend. They would understand.

☝ This content is generated by our users and it is not a substitute for professional medical advice. Please consult with your physician before making any medical decision

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