Choosing to Suffer: When is it Justified?

For me personally, its the medicine sometimes they seem worse then the actual pain im going through. They have all these side effects and warnings, that's why id try to find an alternative solution.

If I know the treatment would interact with other meds, for conditions that are under control.

Especially having bpd when I have a breakdown if I try to repress it, it will just last longer (bpd breakdowns can last for months). I seperate myself from others then feel my feelings so that i won't prolong them by not processing them, even if I'm in agony by doing it. With ptsd it can be similar, sometimes you have to sit with your feelings or cry or breakdown in order to what I call reset so you can get back to a healthier emotional state, otherwise it can lead to numbness, depression, and hopelessness. With chronic illness, sometimes nothing can be done. I have fnd, and there is very little I can do other then try to reduce my stress overall, which is not only difficult but pretty impossible once the pain/disability has already begun. Mobility aids help and I use them, but sometimes I feel too much shame. There can also be a lot of mindsets in mentally ill people that they deserve the pain/suffering or that the only way to learn to live with it is get used to being in pain. With physically disabled and chronically ill people there can be a huge engraved ableist mindset that if you acknowledge that you need anything outside yourself to cope (meds, mobility aids, accommodations, etc.) That you are weak or inherently less then, and that you just should be able to deal with it. This can lead to not wanting to help yourself because you see it as a shameful, weak, or defeated thing.

With what I have the surgery is 50/50. He said 50% it’ll work with an 80-90% chance the pain will return as I get older since this is an injury he sees in older patients 60+ 50% it’ll make it worse. Those aren’t good enough odds for me to risk it. I’m in pain now but I can handle it for the most part the pain I’m already in and have been in for years. I think making it worse would worsen my anxiety and depression. So I said no thank you.

Because it will never go away and I leave the mess for when it gets extra bad so I don't build up tolerance. Sometimes it also feels validating to sit in the worse pain since I am constantly gaslighting myself lol. Or I'm just too tired to deal with it :D so many reasons

For me, I get a lot of headaches. I've started being choosy about when I use Tylenol or Ibuprofen for those because, if I took it every time, it would be super bad for my liver and I'd get a lot of rebound headaches. This is why I actually began prioritizing using heavier duty migraine treatment. Because I was worried about my body with how much over the counter pain relievers I was using.

Self sabotage

Emotionally, when I know feeling my pain is in a healthy amount and when I have to feel it to get through it. Physically, I try to balance my meds so I feel warnings signs of hurting myself more and therefore can stop, but on the other hand pain meds allow blood to the injury to heel faster and allow me to do what I need to do. So I take a small dose when the pain starts, but not enough to try to numb it. Each body is different so dosage and type needs to be what works for you.

If i was running low on medication i use ibuprofen 800mg every 6 hrs i reserve it for days i need to clean do chores or get out if the apartment.

Stubborn as a mule. And I don't like pills... which I take everyday..

i get way too easily addicted to things like pain meds personally

I think the only person that really knows and understands my pain is my chiropractor. I'm in constant pain and take the same meds as usual, some days the meds don't work because the pain is worse, instead of taking something stronger I fight through it. I've been dealing with this lumbar pain for 2 years now.

Ive had 2 reasons now. First was pregnancy and omg. Anyone who loves someone knows its worth it for someone else... but omg. And now after getting to know myself sober i can see what a scary slippery slope treating pain is for me. I am not to be trusted. And narcotics make me hurt worse which makes me (believe i) need more. I am in a shit ton of pain right now and probably forever. I have had spinal surgery and nerves cut. I am very small and have an emotionally and physically volitile 4yr old son half my weight. I am sort of surrendered to life just hurting at this point. That got depressing quick sorry.

Consequences and cost!

Another reason of mine (many of the listed above are true for me too) is that they really don't do much at all. And not just Tylenol or ibuprofen, but even opioids don't stop my pain. I'm flat out frustrated. Yes, I have odd medical conditions, but still...why take something when it's the same pain as before and all the suggested remedies didn't work the last several times. Why keep beating a dead horse.

When it's too painful to move or even talk to ask someone around if they can help

I personally watched my mom bounce from med to med from dr to dr and on and off of things, she has bipolar, and from watching the side effects and the other things, like going to a dr convinced something is wrong but they can't find anything wrong, I typically put off going to dr or taking any medicine. I will got two or more days with a migraine before medicating....

Side effects

If it is causing true emotional and spiritual growth and development in the person. You need both types of insight as well so being on a similar road yourself helps.

My reasoning has been a mix between trying to not look weak to having to show how I am so that the latest physician sees at least a glimpse of what I'm going through.

If it's at night and I'm trying to sleep I wont take certain medications because it keeps me up.

Not being able to afford it

If I'm going to the doctor and want them to see how miserable I am without treatment

If I know the pain is temporary and how long it'll last, I don't bother trying to treat it. My body develops tolerance and resistance so fast, I save effective pain meds for a last resort before going to an emergency room for the really strong stuff I can't get anywhere else. There's no use trying to treat the pain of a broken bone if I know it's not gonna last forever. It's the chronic stuff with no end in sight that really gets to me