Dating as a System: Is It Impossible?

Alarata

387d

How do y handle being a system and dating? it seems impossible

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Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID)

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    • CoffeeBeanC

      172d

      We're dating another DID system (irl), so we have certain headmates who date other certain headmates etc. Most of our system is on at least good platonic terms with most of their system.

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    • hails711

      387d

      I find it best to be up front about it. It's a big thing, so I don't want to waste my time on someone who's unwilling to learn about it

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      • Alarata

        387d

        @hails711 we are up front but just idk dealing w alters of diff ages is just making things impossible and amnesia is making like being present for ppl and showing them we care a nightmare

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    • ExplodingAtom

      387d

      Try to be as up front as you can about your system's boundaries, limits, and triggers. What triggers your littles to come forward? What scares your trauma holders? What triggers any variety of the more protective headmates you have (any sort of self defense reaction the system might have)?

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      • Alarata

        387d

        @ExplodingAtom this is all valid and helpful advice but as a queer intersex person the pool of ppl interested in dating me is already tiny giving anyone who might be interested a job application I feel like reduces it to zero, sry it's valid advice I'm just feeling p low rn I appreciate it

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        • hails711

          387d

          @Alarata you're totally fine. I will agree that when I was exploring my non-straight side I did have a much harder time finding someone, so I somewhat understand the struggle. Back then I didnt even know I had DID, just that I was "off." Not having a name to it did cause me relationship struggles

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    • ParanoiaK

      386d

      I try to explain to my partner what DID is and how it works for them to understand. I am actually dating someone who has DID themselves too so they understand me perfectly.

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      • Alarata

        386d

        @ParanoiaK I'm so jelly, but I'm super glad y have a good situation

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    • RissaB

      386d

      We can talk I'm dealing with the same thing atm

      1

      Reply
    • CoffeeBeanC

      172d

      We're dating another DID system (irl), so we have certain headmates who date other certain headmates etc. Most of our system is on at least good platonic terms with most of their system.

      1

      Reply

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